A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I met this really good looking guy at a friends BBQ last weekend. We hit it off instantly and chatted for hours. We ended the night by kissing. We live in different states and he spoke of me visiting him. We even talked about sex and how he wasn't having any bc he is still attached to the mother of his child (even though they broke up 2 months ago - Its a relationship that's been on and off again for more than 10 years)The next day - we spent more time together. He said he felt very strongly that I should come visit. We spent the night cuddling only. He flew home last Tuesday. I sent him a text wishing him a safe flight and he responded thank you. Now nothing since he's been home. It's been a week . I did text him Wednesday w a picture from the weekend and no response. Should I call - or let it go? I don't know why he'd say all the things he said if sex was already off the table. What was the point?!
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broke up, kissing, text Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (16 July 2014):
Nothing wrong in being a romantic, however, I'd keep going slow with guys. This one was using you as a little week-end fantasy, but apperently he was decent enough to not "try" for sex. Maybe because he KNEW he couldn't really give you squat emotionally.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys. I guess even at this age - I'm a hopeless romantic. It just felt like there was a real connection
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2014): dont call him his not serious about you,let him go and move on
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 July 2014):
in the heat of the moment it sounded good...
in the bright light of day on the way home it no longer sounded like a good plan...
I don't think he lied.
I think he got caught up in "what might be" and was not thinking all that clearly about it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 July 2014):
I agree, he is STILL into the ex-gf. The break up was ONLY 2 months ago.
IF he really wanted to start something more with you he would have been ALL over you (in texts and phone calls).
His loss, move on.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (15 July 2014):
Lackluster explanation, but... a few drinks too many maybe ?. Or simply, a few drinks. Some people become very expressive and affectionate with a little social lubricant inside them, great plans are made, great instant connections are felt, great romantic moments are had,... then the day after is back to normal and to everyday life.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 July 2014):
Just saw your response. I guess he was into having a few kisses and hugs but no sex just because he still wants to remain "faithful" to his girlfriend. Guy mentality. Sorry you are disappointed but when he told you about his relationship status you should have had an inkling how this was going to play out.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 July 2014):
Let it go. Chigirl has the right bead on this I think. He told you straight up that he's still involved with the mother of his child. This definitely sounds like a weekend fling to me as well.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@chigirl - I guess you're right. :(. Just seems way over the top for no sex. I've had guys promise the world to have sex but to just be affectionate and talk for hours? Seemed silly to lie. I'm disappointed.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (15 July 2014):
He wanted some cuddles I guess, that's all. He already said that he's still attached to the mother of his child.. so guess who's bed he was crawling into when he got back home?
It's not rocket science, he obviously is still with this woman back home, so why would he call you? You were weekend-fun, that's all.
Besides, even if he's NOT sleeping with the mother of his child (although he obviously is...) a good looking guy wont need to fly out of state to find a girlfriend, he probably has two or three lined up back home. You were just for the weekend... Sorry.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2014): Don't call. You know he has your number, you've sent a pic. Leave it to him now. Sounds like his heart is not available at this time. Probably seemed like a good idea at the time, for him to see you again, but now he is home again.
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