A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Please can I havw advice on how is is acting, should I give up on him.Met a guy, liked him, he got married, we then had affair for many years, he kept promising to leave the wife etc. He said he would get a place for us never did, was still living with her, we carried on, I kept putting more pressure on him, he then got up and left. Then he left wife soon after and set up home with other lady (who he is still with) We met up recenty a few years later and he claims he loves me and not happy and will be with me, but now month later I haven't heard from him againwhat is going on xx
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female
reader, bemused  +, writes (27 October 2009):
 You should be the last to care. This guy is a bit of a rat with a dismal track record. Find someone available to love you and think no more on this guy. It never went anywhere in the past and it will not going anywhere in the future.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (27 October 2009):
 What is going on is that he doesn't love you. He likes you well enough to sleep with you, but he doesn't care about you enough to actually plan a life with you. You're the back up girlfriend, the one who evidently is content with words, not deeds.
Pay attention to what he does, not what he says. There are some smooth talkers out there who could talk a dog off a meat truck; they get you to believe their lies by apparent sincerity. Look past the charm and loving talk to the actual plans this man makes.
Don't let yourself be used by him again, that is, unless you're looking forward to having your heart stomped on again?
I wish for you a heightened sense of self esteem. Take care.
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