A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:OK, this is sort of embarrassing so that's the only reason I haven't mentioned my name. I have been feeling shitty recently. Problems with a guy I love or thought I loved. I went and fooled around with someone I don't know. Basically I felt trashed.Yesterday I, for the first time, went that little step further with that asshole I thought I loved, then thought I couldn't abide and now I'm not so sure of my felings towards him. We split the condom, dented the headboard had a great time, but... I never came. I never even orgasmed. He came but I'm not sure it felt as good as it looked. This is the second time I've went further than kissing and cuddling and this time more than the last time. I haven't came before. I want to know why. I mean the other guy, OK, but I mean I was happy to be with him. I've waited a long time for such a thing with him. I wanted it to be better.How can I make him enjoy himself more and why didn't I come? Please help me.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, pops +, writes (14 September 2005):
Only you can have an orgasm. When you get good at alone, then you can share that experience with a lover! You need to learn what excites you, and how to bring yourself to orgasm. You have to learn that you will have different kinds of orgasms, and that you will be able to have more, and stronger ones with practice. Once you have mastered your own body, and can make your own orgasms, then you can train your lover on what to do to pleasure you. Take deep breathes in and out, slowly, so that you relax as you are stimulating yourself, or being stimulated. Exhale hard, and then count to 5 before slowly inhaling. At some point when you get very excited, you will gasp for air, and the movement and reaction of your body will put you into orgasm. Have fun.
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