A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: I have almost been with my boyfriend for a year and we fight so much. I think I love him but then theres days when I just dont know anymore. how do I make things better and save our relationship ? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 November 2011):
1. What exactly do you fight over?
and 2. all relationships takes work, but if it is more hassle then "enjoyment" people start to lose how they felt initially for the other person. You are both still young and forming your own personalities, likes, dislikes, values, norm and morals - they might end up not matching each others. That is called growing.
A
female
reader, yami +, writes (21 November 2011):
Sweetie thats no good all you guys are doing is messing up more the relationship heres an advice give eachother space if you guys know that that your gona fight try tell him since were mad lets not talk give some space to eachother,get along cuddle be sweet to eachother!hope this helps!
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (21 November 2011):
If its that much grief, I would get out of the relationship and find someone, you are more compatable with. I know that seems hard, but you are only 17! Why waste time on argueing?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (21 November 2011):
Have you ever thought that if you fight "so much " you should not be together to begin with ?....You just don't work as a couple, that's all.
I know that some people thinks that fights and arguments are the spice of a relationship and make it " hotter " and more interesting. Could be , personally I don't believe that, but I guess it would be anyway a matter of quantity and frequency. If you feel that "so much " is already " too much " and it has always been like this, probably it's time to call it quits.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (21 November 2011):
at 17 if it's bad, i don't think the effort needed to save a relationship is worth it...
if you THINK you love him but don't KNOW... then maybe the relationship has run it's course?
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (21 November 2011):
What are some of the fights about? You're question is too vague, so I can't pinpoint of where you're going wrong.
1. Pick and choose your battles. Don't fight about every niggling thing.
For example, he wants to go watch the new Muppet movie but you want to go see Twilight, then you guys start arguing about which movie to see and can't settle on one. This is a petty fight, that needs to be let go. If he isn't willing to budge then it's you who must cave and see the Muppet movie just to end this ridiculous argument.
2. Properly communicate. Instead of yelling which only increases fighting, try lowering your voice and talk to him, rather than at him.
3. Apologize for what fault you had in the argument. Usually an apology from your boyfriend follows.
Tell him you want to stop fighting. It takes too much energy to fight. However, sometimes if you find yourself fighting 24-7 then it's very possible you two just aren't compatible. In that case, a break-up is the solution.
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A
male
reader, HiGPS +, writes (21 November 2011):
As long as you become friends again after a fight and are honest to each other it will last forever.
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