A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes: I am 54 with a cute wife, in spite of that i was allured to a cute widow co-worker with 3 kids who's 42. I feel happy to look at her and talk to her, i have not had an affair but have a sexual fantasy. She is aware i am fond of her, but we cant break social customs. Please advise me. Is it wrong to adore her? Is this a sickness. If so, what is a remedy?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your valuble suggestions
A
female
reader, michelleAKAmandi +, writes (2 October 2008):
It's definitely not a sickness. It happens to many people!!! Oh so many! However; you can be one of VERY VERY few to not let this interfere with your life, marriage, conscience and love. This would be so horrible for you. I'm sure it feels good to look at her and talk to her. I know the fantasy is exciting, but let it be just that... a fantasy! Once you have that fantasy, it is no longer and it's not as fun and exciting, then what? No cute wife?!
As Irish said, I think you know what you should do.
You're merely sorting out things. Don't you think?
Keep your head on straight and hang tough for your beliefs and your marriage.
Good luck and let us know how you are doing.
Take care,
Michelle
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2008): No it's not wrong, and no this isn't a sickness. This is a crush with some sexual fanatasy thrown in. You know the boundaries of the social customs here-you know the boundaries of your marriage. You seem to have accepted this is just fantasy and rationalized it all through. This type of romantic/sexual infatuation is something many people experience but most of us allow it to pass and die off. I feel if this fantasy of yours..is kept in perspective and never thought of becoming a reality, time will take care of it. You state you have a wife and family. Sounds like you love your life and that you value what you have, which is the bounty of family love. Something you should prize and hold dearly (I am sure you do). You seem to know clearly, what you could jeopardize all that, if you pursued this fantasy. Leave it at that and give some thought to perhaps romanticizing that wonderful wife you have at home?? Now that would be a reality worth going after. Take care and good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2008): All i can say is the grass isn't always greener and why in the heck would you want involved at your age with a young lady with 3 kids.Trust me you will regret all of this.If you have a cute wife stay with her.Sexual thought just make your hormones go wild and after you have this young lady a while you will see you made a huge mistake.You probably have children who are grown.EWhy on earth would you want to start raising someone elses kids at your age.You need to get a reality check.
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