A
male
age
36-40,
*ng.ali
writes: She was everything in my life.We had bben together more than 4 years.We planned to get married,but broke up.It was not my mistake or her mistake,we both were stupid.Now she got married and she moved on,but idid not and I can not forget her.Also I really feel weak when I think about her,because I really miss her.Do not tell me to find other girl,because I tried but I couldnt forget her. What I should do to forget her plz???
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female
reader, TEM +, writes (7 March 2011):
You've heard the line, "The first cut is the deepest," right? You loved this woman very much, and at your age four years is a big chunk of your life. You will not forget her, but in time the hurt and longing that you feel will fade.
I will not tell you to meet someone else. You will not be ready to love again until you have fully grieved the loss of this relationship. It is not a good idea to escape the pain by running to someone else. It is my opinion that you will never get over her if you do that.
It is normal to feel as you do. You must allow yourself to feel the pain and work through it. Cry if you need to. Get it out of your system. The good news is, there are only so many tears we can shed. Eventually you will come out of this dark place.
Each day will get a little better, but getting over her will not happen overnight. It's a process. It will take as long as it takes. You must be patient with yourself. In the meantime it is a good idea to change or avoid those things that trigger memories of her. Listen to new music. Frequent different places.
It is also a good idea to find supportive people to talk to. This is tough for a guy, as guys are reluctant to discuss such sensitive matters with each other. The most important thing is to surround yourself with people that support you and avoid those that do not.
Try to get some exercise every day, even if you don't feel like it. If you have hobbies or interests, try to engage in them as well. You may not feel like it at first, but after a little while you will, and you will feel better.
One day she will be no more than a bittersweet memory.
Hugs,
TEM
A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (7 March 2011):
How long has this been going on?
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