A
female
age
36-40,
* carly
writes:hi guys 3 months ago i broke up with my boyfriend who was really bad to me,we are now exs. i wrote in about him a while ago and i got some really nice advice to just leave him,so i did that and everything has been okay but i havent been able to get over him,and it also seems like i m not,see the thing is we are not in contact at all,but recently he has been telling people our most intimate things we shared,the reason we broke up is because he cheated on me and i found out that i was a rebound when we got back 2gether and then soon after,we broke up over the same girl,but he really is with her and she is pregnant and he wants the gifts he gave me which are his photos as a child and just growing, but he did not tell me this,he sent people to tell me, tbh iam emotionally attached to the photos and i feel like i am totally losing him please help.Should i just them to him?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2012): Honey, you deserve better than him. Trust me you will get over it eventually. You don't need those pictures. You want something to cling too; but you don't need it
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 July 2012): If they are photos of him as a child and growing up, they are more personal to him than they are to you, so I think he does have a right to them.
Why do you want to keep hold of things that are only going to make it harder for you to move on?
He's obviously treated you like sh*t and doesn't care about you, so he isn't worth your hurt.
I know its hard to get over a broken heart at first, but you need to keep focused on yourself and moving on, get rid of anything that reminds you of him as quickly as possible and keep telling yourself you don't need him. You managed fine before you met him and you will manage again now he's gone, you just need to give it time and stay strong :)
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (31 July 2012):
 If they are photoes of him as a child then I think you should give them back. You should not keep pictures of him around when you want to get over him.
Not all people can be trusted, even the ones we love the most. But it looks bad on him when he tells other people your intimate details. He is the one who looks immature and foolish when he goes telling things that were private.
I would give the photoes back. They should not have value to you, because the photoes are not of you, they are of HIM. And you are trying to get over him. You need to let go of the things that remind you of him, because the memories are just going to hurt you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (31 July 2012):
 I agree, make copies if you REALLY think you need/want then and mail him the originals, I wouldn't even bother meeting him face to face to give em back. That will just make him think you "care".
Get him and all his "little gifts" out of your life and start fresh!
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (31 July 2012):
 You know, I read your question several times, and I literally struggled on the advice to give, because the evil in me who got pissed when I read how he cheated on you wanted me to advise you to set them on fire and dance around it, I know that's definitely not the way to go.
Abella's right. They're easily duplicated. Make a copy of that picture. However, it pissed me off that he sent other people to ask you for the pictures.
Tell these "other people" that if he wants them, he needs to see you face to face. No, you don't want him. He has more baggage than Samsonite. But if he wants these precious pictures, he owes you the respect to ask for them himself. He's a cheater and a coward if he doesn't.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (31 July 2012):
 If you are emotionally attached to the photos (even though he does not deserve such loyalty) then go to the store and have the photos copied.
Then post him the originals so that he has to sign for them when the postman delivers the parcel to him.
or
If that is too hard then position the photos carefully on a stable surface so that the photos are upright and use your mobile phone camera to take a photo of each picture. The result will not be as good as option one above, but at least you will have the photo.
Then post him the originals so that he has to sign for them when the postman delivers the parcel to him.
He is a Control freak and you are well rid of him. One day you will bless the day he walked away from you.
Eventually, when you work through why you think it OK to still like a man who has treated you so badly, then you will be ready for a much nicer man.
Work on building your own self esteem as you need a much more respectful man as your partner than this Crass nasty guy.
You do deserve much better than this guy. And eventually you will find much nicer man than this guy.
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