A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hi i ended my 5 year relationship 2 weeks ago due to his lazy immature behaviour as soon as he got home from work he would start getting stoned then by night time he would be falling asleep on the settee and basically I got bored he spends hundreds on it a month theres things that we need for our children and home which he will never help me to buy I only work part time due to looking after our 2 children the problem is I ended the relationship which I needed to do but now hes acting as though nothings happened and were still together hes going on about redecorating the house and trying to spend more time with us but I know things wont last they never do which is why I ended it any ideas what to do thank you
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male
reader, Pepi let pew +, writes (25 March 2019):
He needs time away to reflect on his issues. Once he is out of the relationship he will be able to see what he did wrong. Trust, and honesty are need to be respected in a relationship. He also needs to show you affection and make you feel secure. Get of the weed and grow up. Take responsibility for being a parent. Kick him out and let him learn from his mistake. Then he will come back a changed and better man.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2019): I am working part time I can afford to support us financially I did not ask this question to talk about money
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A
male
reader, Guesswhothisis +, writes (24 March 2019):
You said it. He's a stoner. You need to decide what you really want. You either need to move out and ove on. Be done with him. Or put up with him getting stoned all the time.
Once you've made your bed. Make sure that's it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2019): Correction:
"You aren't working full-time; and he's your primary source of income."
"You will also have to get a full-time job.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2019): You aren't working, and he's your only source of income. How would you feed and shelter yourself and your children?
He can't be smoking pot around small children. Child protection authorities could intervene, and your kids can be taken away from both of you. All it takes is a concerned neighbor or relative making an anonymous phone-call! He could get caught and arrested for possession; or during a sting operation while attempting to purchase pot.
You've got to lay-down some serious ultimatums about the pot smoking. He spends too much money on it; which means he's addicted. So you may have to move-out and move-in with relatives. You may also have to get legal-works going for child-support; and if necessary, get a restraining order requiring him to get drug-rehabilitation before he can see his kids.
That's a lot of tough stuff to do. He doesn't respect your choice to end the relationship; and refuses to acknowledge it. So you have to take drastic measures to have him take you seriously. You will also have to get a job.
Once he sees you're serious about it all; he'll do the right thing. If you've broken-up on and off many times before; don't expect him to take you seriously.
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