A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 14, and My boyfriend(16) and I are sure that We want a future together....but the only thing is, We are in a long-distance Relationship. We talk about this all the time and I'm having such a hard time deciding what to do. My Boyfriend is most likely coming down to be with Me soon and this is the first time We will Meet in Person. He said He really really wants to start Our future now and He wants a baby now. I want one too because I really want to be with Him and spend My life with Him. And He promised not to leave Me and to Help support as much as He can and He said He will wait until I am ready but that makes Him go back to where He lives until I decide I want a Baby. I don't know if I should wait because I know all the difficulties and responsibilities that come along with this. I just really love Him and I'm ready to be with Him Forever, I need Advice.
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male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (22 March 2009):
 Wow that makes it all better you should definitely have his baby if you have seen him on web cam! Unfortunately online relationships are more about the idea of falling in love than actually really falling in love you may not even like him when you meet him.
I personally think that starting a family just to trap someone into a relationship is morally wrong, you are both too young and still in school. You can't afford to bring up a child and you don't have the social skills needed for parent hood as you assume an internet relationship is a good basis for getting to know one another.
If you meet and do actually fall in love, you should both think seriously, about education and getting jobs and somewhere to live before bringing a life into the world, YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT A BABY HUMAN NOT A HAMSTER! In fact get a hamster and see if you can actually get it to survive with out the help of your parents!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOh and by the way, We have seen each other over webcam
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male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (22 March 2009):
Is this a wind up?? I want a baby with a guy I've never met? Seriously?
Sweetheart I really think you need to read your post and the answers are there looking back at you!
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY he might be 40 for all you know, come on a baby with an internet boyfriend! The more I think about this the angrier I get!
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female
reader, Asiamericaluv +, writes (22 March 2009):
Alright, you may not like the sound of this but holddd up. Did you say when and IF he comes down to visit you, it'll be the first time you've met in person?!! Howdju meet the guy? & if you haven't seen him yet, how can you base a real & true relationship off of just promises & love that can't be proved yet? Be careful, it doesn't matter if he calls you, how nice he is to you, how much he says he loves you or the pictures he sends you, if you've never met him face to face, how can you be sure that he's really who he says/shows you he is? Please PLEASE consider what you're doing.
Also, i knew a girl that had her 2nd baby at age 14 last year...she was so happy at the beginning of motherhood & so was her boyfriend. They were gonna get her parents consent to marry when they turned 16, but since they had a long distance relationship like yourself, her boyfriend couldnt always stay with her. He tried to be with her & their babies as much as possible, but since he was 15 & still young, he had to return home to his family once in a while. Well the girl became so stressed over her babies & her boyfriend not always being there to care for them with her, like he originally promised he would, she committed suicide when her children were only 1 & a half & 4 months old. Please be safe, please be smart about your decisions. You have a long life aheada you, remember that there's no need for you to be rushing your future with him, & he'll understand this if he truly loves you.
Best of luck :). xoxo
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): Also if he loves you. He will wait.. I have an idea, tell him you dont want a baby. See how he reacts! then you might see who he really is, and what he really wants.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): HONEY wow I outta smack you. YOUR 14 your a baby..... He is to young your way to freaking young. I had my baby at 17 and It was the hardest thing ever. The father.. Nowhere to be found loved me till i got prego then ran!!! Typical guy, listen if you do this your not bound to this kid. that boy could ran so fast you wouldnt notice what hit you. Then you would be stuck at 15 buy then with a baby at home struggling.. GIRL I REALLY WISH I COULD KNOCK SOME SENSE INTO YOU..... Please consider what your doing, and look around single moms everywhere. Bc daddies couldn't man up to what they did.. and at 14 you shouldnt even be having sex... You better becareful ..
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female
reader, lotus mama808 +, writes (22 March 2009):
 Babies don't bring a girl and a boy together forever. A commitment does. You guys are not ready to produce a baby. I am 9 months pregnant with my 3rd child, absolutely miserable, pain everywhere, feel like a fat cow, and my poor husband has to stand by and take care of me, cause I can hardly do it myself. I am happy with my kids, however, there are a lot of things I wish I had taken care of before I had them. I was 20 when I had my 1st. Sooo, at 14, there are a lot of things you NEED to take care of before taking care of a child, and if he loves you as much as he claims, he will respect that you are a strong person with goals that will ultimately benefit your future child in a big way. Spend this time becoming financially independent, starting with school, then work, then career. Theeeeen, have your baby, and give them everything they could ever want and need with the profits of your hard work. Trust me. This is very good advice!
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