A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need helping dealing with his new guy in my life. Bit of a backstory; my last couple of relationships have been awful. Really awful. I've had really bad experiences with men, but the last couple were the nails in the coffin I guess. One forgot to tell me he was married and the other, who I had known for years, convinced me he wanted a relationship, slept wirt me, and then said we were friends with benefits. After this, I decided to just concentrate on my studies. I'm a first year history student in London and so far things are going good. I've got more time to spend with my friends, more time to do "me things" like going to museums or going for walks, and I'm generally happier. Thing is these last couple of weeks I've developed a crush on a guy in my history class and he is always really flirty with me. I wrote a question on here about it at the time wondering what I should do. On one hand I was worried that if I went anywhere near another guy I would end up stressed and upset like I was before, but on the other hand this guy is nothing like any of the other guys I've been with, i.e. he's not my "type", and my friends all think I should give him a shot. I've since decided to maybe give him a shot. He is the complete opposite of other me I have dated or been with. My question now is what do I do so I don't mess this up. I feel like there's something really innocent about my crush on him and I want to take things slow. He always flirts with me inclass and sits beside me and when I get up to leave he always walks beside me through the campus. He's added me on facebook. We both live in campus and both obviously like history. What now?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2008): You just need to spend more time with him. You have the same interests so I think maybe you should go for a day out, like to a museum or something else that would spark both your interests. The more time you spend with him then the more apparent any chemistry between you will become. It is definitely good to try someone who isn't your type as maybe your type isn't really what's best for you, it's just who you pull easiest. I'm trying to make the same changes in my love life by finding a boyfriend who is satisfied with his life (three boyfriends have used me to pick them up off the floor and then left me for someone else when they felt better.) And yeah talk loads on facebook and msn and on the phone. But yeah, take it slowly, go at your own pace. You'll know when it needs to speed up/slow down =]
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