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female
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*ove bug
writes: Ah really need some help me and my boyfriend have only been going out for just over 2 weeks and he is my first serious boyfriend. I have introduced him to my parents and they seem to get along ok but everytime he comes round we go straight to my bedroom to listen to music and talk nothing else...but my dad is being paranoid and has got it in to his head that we are fooling around. The other night we both got back late from the cinema and went to my bedroom to collect his things by the time we had talked and said goodbye we had been about half and hour whcih we completely didn't realise... anyway my dad stormed in and said to my boyfriend that it was time for him to leave and said "and in future" and gave him a list of things he wanted him to do like get me home at a decent time (when it wasnt even him driving) and not come straight to his daughters bedroom because it was disrespectful. anyway i was so shocked and embarissed i stood there open mouthed and now me and my boyfriend are scared to meet up because of him, i feel as though we cant be ourselves now because my dad is watching are every move i really want them both to get along becuase i no my boyfriend is a decent guy but my dad doesnt seem to see this when he doesnt even no him. What should we do? should he come round to mine next time to smooth things over or should I go to his house Im not sure if this would just make things worse please help! x x x Reply to this Question
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female
reader, snowbird  +, writes (10 July 2006):
 Typical case of a dad looking after his daughter! It happens the world over, and generation after generation - I can remember my dad doing the same!! That's what dads are FOR!! (he he) - but some dads can be a little clumsy about it, and with his protective instinct (cut him some slack, he has not had much practise); he put 2 + 2 together and made 20!! I can remember feeling just the same way.. But it has happened, and all you can do is have a calm word with your dad,and tell him that your boyfriend is scared to come around now, and see what he says, and what he wants you to do. Just let your dad get to know your boyfriend a bit better and to see that he is a good 'sort' and would never disrespect him or you- either in your house or out. Go in and say 'hi' whenever you have been out, and let him know what time he can expect you back, and let him know if you are running late. Respect works both ways.. perhaps get a cup of tea for everyone before you go up - and just ask "ok if we go up?? Maybe leave the door open to gain their trust. It is just a misunderstanding. Good luck!
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