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female
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*ophie758
writes: I'm 18 and i've been with my boyfriend who is 30 5 months and we are talking abvout moving in together later this year and going on holiday soon.We love each other and hes told me hes never been this happy but he has an ex girlfriend who he is still really good friends with.They broke up 2 years ago and were together 8 years and broke up because they became friends. i just seem to feel really weird whenever she rings or they meet and he even if he talks about her.I believe him that it is over her and loves me but i just cant stop feeling like this. What do i do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2006): I have the same problem with the caveat that my girlfriend was sleeping with her ex-boyfriend right up until she got together with me, even though she'd broken up with him because he treated her badly.
I tried to adjust to the idea that she could still be friends with him but in the end I decided that I couldn't live with the way it made me feel. I gave her an ultimatum and I think it was justified. In my opinion if you're in a relationship then it must be placed above previous relationships. It all comes down to what you're willing to accept. Do what you have to in order to reach a reconciliation. My girlfriend decided that our relationship was more important than her relationship with her ex. Good luck.
A
male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (10 July 2006):
 Explain your feelings. I mean he is being up front about it and he is still with you. I think you're having a touch of insecurity. Its normal seeing as how they were together for 8 years and thats a long time to be with someone. Just be honest with him and trust him. He has not given you a reason not to. To be fair though you can't hold that in. Relationships are about communication and trust. These are two things you are letting slip away by harboring these feelings. Talk to him and trust him. He seems to be an honest guy. Good Luck.
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