A
male
age
30-35,
*oafreak
writes:Hey. This girl and I have been freinds for a while. She had had feeling for me sice 7th grade and had asked me out a bunch of times. The first time it stunned me and I didn't know what to do. I told her I was gay and had a friend back me up. I know this really hurt her, probabally mostly because she didn't buy it. Then every other time I said "no I'm to busy for a relationship right now," which every time i didn't have anything going on besides school. So a week before homecoming this year I went to a football game with her and her family. Afterwards we went to her grandparents house for dinner. We got to talking in the basement. She did most of it and then asked me how I really felt for her. I told her and she seemed so happy then when we got back to her huse I stayed until minight. We played board games, listened to the radio and talked about our childhoods and just problems we,ve had. When her mum said I had to go she walked me to my truck. We stood there in the cold for 15 minuets talking then suddenly she kissed me, my first kiss. I went home feeling so happy I couldn't get to sleep till five in the morning. The next week was homecoming. She had a bf but something happened and they suddenly weren't going out any more, I was so happie when she called asking me to be her date. So we went to dinner and to the dance together. One of her guy friends,who was supposed to be working showed up. At first this was fine untill the next slow song came up. I was talking to one of my freinds and when i turned around I saw him and her dancing very closely. This threw me off a little but i didn't take it to hard. The next time a slow song came on i was there and she chose him over me. I casually walked over to my freinds and sat down. they could tell something was wrong but i wouldn't tell them what. they all left early. After that I was left sitting in the corner by myself. My lab parter from biology, who had been my fried for a while also, came up and sat down. She asked what was wrong. I couldn't hold back any more. When she hugged me I just broke down and cried. She was there when I needed someone. I told her everything. Then after the dance I was taking the first girl home and she asked why I had just gone away and dissappered for a while. I explaned for her what I was feeling and thinking. She said, " I'm sorry but I waited so long for you and those feelings are gone". So I dropped her off and went home crying the whole way that monday at school I saw the first girl and the other guy holding eachoter in the halls and kissing between classes. I got to biology and I saw my lab partner, who i had just helped get out of this bad relationship with this selfish aragent guy. He was mad at me because we were friends but she needed to be out of that. I saw here and I just smiled. I felt my heart race and butterflys in my stomache when she said "how are you?" I said I was much better ever since then we've been getting closer but i haven't told her i like her yet. I'm not really shure how she feels. I could really use any advice you have for me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2007): doafreak, this sounds like typical high school stuff, but a little immature on your part. Sorry, but honesty is my way. Have you been really honest with yourself? You seem uncomfortable expressing yourself to others. Very common and natural at your age. Often, adolescent boys and girls have difficulty distinguishing between "liking" and something deeper. That is why "crushes" usually are very temporary. Hey, listen; letting a girl know she is "special" to you is not a proposal of marriage! Lighten up. You will meet and know many whom you consider special as you get older. When that "one" comes along, you will know it. But, I predict it will be a few years from now. (smile) Best wishes, Tom
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