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female
,
anonymous
writes: I've been going out with my boyfriend for a year now, he's had quite a few sexual partners and no other relationships and I've just had one other very serious relationship. The thing is that he has never made me orgasm, and doesn't even seem bothered about this. I told him I can't orgasm by intercourse alone and I need oral etc but he still never tries. I try to push him in the right direction but he'll do it for a minute or so and just seem bored so it's not really a turn on for me. The problem is - I want to tell him he's being selfish in bed but don't want to put him right off. How can I talk to him about this and get him to pay attention to me!??
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female
reader, imnotcircumsized  +, writes (6 December 2007):
 you need to be very blunt with him, because unless you tell him that there's a problem that needs to be fixed NOW, he'll probably go on avoiding it because he is, however, still getting what he wants even though you gain nothing. if he's not willing to even attempt to give you pleasure, and won't bring it up to make sure you're not totally annoyed by now (a year and not having an orgasm- OUCH), he really doesn't seem to care. i would start dating someone orally fixated if i were you... you most-likely only get of clitorally. find someone willing to please you.
A
male
reader, Psyx  +, writes (5 December 2007):
 Maybe you should try making it fun for him to please you...Buy some chocolate body paint,maybe even some toys...but make it so that he derives pleasure from giving you pleasure...
Respond (even if u fake it a bit) very drastically to things he does right and maybe he will do it more! :D
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A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (4 December 2007):
 I think the key here is communication, if he is being selfish in the bedroom depaertment, which by the sound of it he is you should tell him. Its not fair that he gets his satifaction, then leaves you unsatisfied. Choose a good time and broach the subject to him. After talking to him and expressing how unsatisfied you are, you are giving him the opportunity to change and pay more attention to you. If you find he is still being selfish you may want to consider whether this relationship is really for you. But like i said talk to him and give him the chance to change.
All the best x
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