A
male
age
41-50,
*ugostephen
writes:I split with my girlfriend 2 months ago, we are expecting our first child, she did not want to stay together for the sake of the baby as she no loger loves me. I feel very lonley very isolated, every night i dream of my ex and i wake up upset because they feel very real. I cant imagine having to start over with another girl let myself get close to somone else. She is coping ver well with this, she seams very happy and content in what she is doing. I got on with her family so well and went out wth then every weekend i so miss this friendship and connection i had with her parents, i cant go to the places i loved with them anymore, the pain hurts so much. I am worried about the future because i feel i dont have one and when she gets a new boyfriend could i cope
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female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (30 May 2008):
 Oh Hun big hugs for you xxxxx. How disheartening for you to for her to let you down like this. Are there any other reasons why she has split up with apart from not loving you no more?
She may have found someone else, I don't mean to jump to conclusions here but that may be the reason why she does not want to continue the relationship with you. Have you sorted out access to the baby yet?
I think you and your ex should come to an amicable agreement concerning your access to the child. I hope she does not use the baby as a weapon to get back at you.It would be very unfair to the child if he/she is caught in a bitter battle, hopefully it will never come to that.
Look love if you want to personally mail me, you are most welcome. Take care Hun xxx.
A
female
reader, angela2  +, writes (30 May 2008):
 Hi HugostephenI feel very related to your situation. I feel like I want to wtite something as I am also experience the same. My ex moved on and are content with his new life. should haven been happy for him for I believe when one turly love a person, he/she wants him to be happy whether he/she with him or with someone else. But I find it hurts so much when I realised that he does move on and is pursuing someone else. I know the pain which I even could not give it an exact name.Like you, I even can not imagine being intimate with someone else. And my ex coped it so much better than me.I could not move on as I am still very much in love with him. Thinking about him hurts. Knowing that he is in another relationship so soon hurts more. I also do not know about the future. But I know it is useless to brood over the past as it only prolongs the pain. I do not know how to give you advice for I also need someone to help me. But let's believe someday we will be in love again. And let's enourage each other. Maybe god wants us to meet a fer wrong people before we meet the right one, so when we meet him/her, we will be grateful and cherish her/him.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (30 May 2008):
 Hi mate,
I'm really sorry to see you going through this it must be painful.
After two months if you are still feeling like this I think you should get some counselling. While it would be expected to still be hurt after this period of time you sound quite distressed. You could end up damaging you health so get someone to talk to ( a professional )before your life ends up in the crapper - sorry to be blunt but you have got to try and .
Your ex wife has moved on with her life for her own reasons and I'm sure she is not having as easy a time as you might think she is. As hard as that is to handle you are going to find a way sometime in the future to accept it. She will move on with her life and you will too.
But you have one miracle coming out of this relationship , your child, and that is what you should focus on in the future.
Its not going to be easy, but you will pull through buddy.
All the best.
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A
male
reader, a-g55 +, writes (30 May 2008):
 I actually feel the same pain when i read that. I think everyone will tell you to sit and talk to someone about it and hopefully somebody might reassure you and make you feel better but what i can suggest is this.... im assuming that there still is some contact. i think it would be nice to know exactly why she felll out of love with you. you need to explain to her that you need to know so you can adress your own personal issues. it might shock you and embarass the things she says to you but the benifit is that she suddenly paints a picture about you that when u look at it from her point of view you can see why she fell out of love and you just wont do those things again. if its physical then come back on here and we shall advise you on how to change how you feel about yourself phycicaly with some techniques and coaching but start with drilling out of her what is wrong with you. or maybe send one of her friends in their. explain that you need to know the most deepest honest things that are wrong coz you dont want it to happen again. that idea has worked on many of my clients and you feel much better after.
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