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We are both virgins in a LDR together. How should I initiate touching her chest?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Long distance, Trust issues, Virginity<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 April 2014) 5 Answers - (Newest, 24 April 2014)
A male Sweden age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I have been in a long distance relationship with an amazing woman for over 2 years.

We are both virgins, and I just wondered how I should go about touching her chest?

Should I ask her first or just go ahead and try? I really have no idea what I should do.

I should probably mention that I did manage to touch her backside without asking her, and she just laughed about it and seems happy enough for me to do that.

I just don't want to make her uncomfortable if I was to suddenly put my hands on one of her most private areas, so answers from both sexes here would be most appreciated.

Thank you

View related questions: both virgins, long distance

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A male reader, CMMP United States +, writes (24 April 2014):

It's not like you just walk up to her and grab her boobs. You work up to it, or any intimacy, and step by step if it feels right you keep going.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2014):

As a 23-year-old woman, I have to disagree with Cerberus--asking for consent is NOT a turn-off! I think it's kind of sexy and shows respect!!

I agree with Daisy--move your hands slowly. Don't suddenly grab anything. If you're passionately kissing you can have your hands around her waist, touching her back, stomach etc. If you start to move your hands slowly up to her chest, stop for a second and say, "Is it okay if I touch you here", and if she says yes, that means she wants you to :)

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A female reader, Daisy_Daisy United Kingdom +, writes (24 April 2014):

Daisy_Daisy agony auntDon't "suddenly" do anything! When you're getting close, having a kiss, let your hands gently explore. She will give you signals if she's uncomfortable. You can approach the chest area by moving your hands slowly down from her neck to shoulders, or by moving your hands slowly up from her waist. Note the word slowly: it gives her a chance to feel comfortable, and a chance for her to move your hands to a 'safer' place if she's not comfortable. Whatever you do, don't just grab at them!

And when you're there, be gentle with stroking and so on. Women can be a bit sensitive, and more than a gentle squeeze can be uncomfortable. Gentle stroking, involving the nipple if you feel brave enough, is far more pleasurable for the woman than vigorous squeezing.

Good luck and have fun.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2014):

Just go ahead and do it.

When you're kissing each other and you're caressing her body, just make your way slowly up there and gently caress them.

OP asking is the biggest turn off ever. I know the world is awash with all this shit about getting permission to do things to women, but it's actually a major turn off for them.

Just gently go for them in the heat of the moment on top of clothes, then make your under her clothes after that.

OP the face and neck are far better though, seriously putting your hand on a woman's face has much deeper emotional impact.

OP when you become more experienced you'll learn that women have no problem with you trying things like that, if they don't like you doing something they'll pull your hand away or tell you not to. They have no problem with that, it means nothing. Things like that are only an issue if they pull your hand away and you try again during that session.

OP she's your girlfriend of two years, she really won't mind you trying it on with her. Just respect her if she says no or refuses, it's that simple.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2014):

I think you need to consider when the LDR part of your relationship is going to end. How much time have you spent together in person? Have you spoken about one of you moving closer to the other?

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