A
female
age
41-50,
*ountryaly76
writes:Well I'm back again for more advice. I got back together with my ex, it's been about 6 months or more now. While I think he is a good dad and a great provider. I can't seem to get the feelings back for him. We have undergone counseling and workshops, nothing seems to help. He seems like a different person there than he does at home. I feel like maybe I'm the problem. He seems very content being here. And the kids are ok with it. The thing is when he is here I still feel alone. We don't talk, we never sit and watch TV together. Most of the time when he is off work he does the same thing every time. He will sleep until I fix his breakfast, he will eat and them watch TV from the recliner until lunch in done and then it's the same thing, eat watch TV all day. Is it wrong for me to want more from him? Like to go out to dinner. Or to have a conversation. I feel like I'm just here to take care of everything, clean the house, take care if the kids and him. Is this normal with relationships if people out age. He is 43 and I'm 37. I still feel young and I have energy. I don't want to sit and watch TV all day. I want to have someone to hug me or kiss me, just because. And sex with him still hasn't happened after 6 months. Everyone thinks he is the most wonderful guy, and I did too in the beginning. Should I continue this any longer, will it eventually get better. I'm tired of going to counseling. I know I'm the one that ultimately has to make this decision. But I'm not sure of what to do. I mean, I could go on like this fir the rest of my life but I wouldn't be very happy. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks in advance.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (27 January 2014):
Why would it get better? If all he does is eat and watch TV I'd leave and find yourself someone that knows how to properly live life.
Not to mention, he couldn't be that good of a dad if his focus is on tv and not you and the children.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (27 January 2014):
 Print off your question to us, and go see the counsellor, on your own, one more time. Unless your counsellor has a particular ethos or line to push (eg church aligned or other), they should be able to help you make a decision that works for you, not for your husband.
I can certainly see where you are coming from. If a man was desperate to get back with you, because he loved you, and missed you, and wanted you desperately sex would have been one of the first things on his mind.
Why the hell should you accept this life you have described to us, what a terribly lonely boring future it holds, for both of you.
I wish you well, good luck!
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