A
female
age
36-40,
*tinak
writes: OK,so it's been two weeks since my ex and I started talking again, and wanting to work things out. He was the dumper, I the dumpee. I know it will take awhile for things to get back to how they once were, and I still have this uneasy feeling deep inside, and i know he does too. I was a total bitch in the relationship, and it got to the point where he couldn't take it anymore. Now,of course, I'm taking steps to make sure I don't hurt him again..But I feel like he has so man doubts. He acts really weird over text messaging. For instance, he will give me one word answers, or not really explain anything. I'll ask him how was school? And he will respond with, It was ok. Nothing else..Ahhh I hate to be overreacting..It just feels so strange..
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female
reader, BunnyTee +, writes (27 May 2010):
First: it is impossible for things to return to the way they were. That was then, this is now. The fact that you're back together, having broken up, means the dynamics are much altered. Now, where is Ask Older Sister when I need her? She's much better at this part than I.
It's a brand new day, girl. You've stated that you're intentionally doing things differently, so it stands to reason that he'll react differently, doesn't it?
Also notwithstanding is the fact that men have a tendency to adopt either end of the spectrum when it comes to wordiness. Some are what I call"word economical" single word responses, no flourishes, cut and dried. Others will talk you to death and as has been said elsewhere: worry it to pieces like a terrier with a rodent.
Could be that your guy is only responding in a way that he feels is adequate and sufficient, now.
I have one of those "word economical" guys and though it takes some getting used to, I would prefer that over a guy who can and does talk more than I do!
Give things a chance to settle into the new groove. Once it all comes back online, it'll shake out. Hang in there!
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