A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:ok ummm im 13 and my gf is 17 weve been together for nearly a year and i love her with all my heart ........do you think that its a big age diffrence for us? also her parents hate me so much! i cant talk to her anymore kuz they caught us having sex!? we both are christians and we cant have bf/gfs and the only way we can stay together is to have a baby and we have both agreed on it...... should we do it? im willing to be with her for the rest of my life and the babys life 2.........should we have the baby?
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female
reader, Michelaa  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 what are you getting ureself into ? think of it like this you are 13 you will be traped so much there are not much things out there for young one's to do but going ahead and having a baby isn't really something for a 13 year old to be thinking of. trust me it won't be worth it. you still have your whole life a head of you think before you go ahead and do it. and as for your girlfriend being 17 going out with a 13 year old just isn't right she should be in the jail and sorry to upset you by saying that but it's true i am only 14 and wouldnt dream of going out with any one a year younger than me. x
A
male
reader, roadman +, writes (2 January 2009):
 If your ready to pop shots to breed and having sex with out protection then nothing can stop the process what anyone things...
At your age I doubt very much you have the cash or know how to support a child...give it a few more years then think about it again..
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A
male
reader, The Gentle Man +, writes (2 January 2009):
 No. You will unlikely be together forever and a baby is not an excuse to play on. Neither you or her are old enough to think of the massive life impact this would have.
Think of all the family that would be dragged into what im sure will be a bloody battle.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): No way, it will be way too much work , you are too young to be a father! Get that ridiculous idea out of your head, the financial strain will be immense, and your parents will be very very very angry and you may become an outcast, it would also affect your studies! Don't/
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): heya im 15 also and i dont think you should go through with this. you have your whole life ahead of you and i know your prob thinking age is only a number and it is but your still a child yourself you wont have the responsibiltys to look after a child you dont want your life ruined. anyways i hope everything works out and your happy :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): Hi, I'm 15 and personally I don't think that the age gap is that big of a deal.
But tbh I think your stupid if your actually gonna go through with this.
How are you gonna feed and look after this kid?
You both havent got jobs? and still in school?
You need a good stable relationship before bringing a precious thing like that into your lives.
I meen say she does have this kid, surely this will make her parents hate you even more.
Cuz she won't be able to do things on her own.
You'll probably end up wreckin your life, your girlfriends life and your babies.
Talk things through with her.
If your so set on doing this at least wait till your legal.
Cuz I'm sure your girlfriend can get into serious trouble for this?
Your still young and have your whole life ahead of you.
You should be out enjoyin it not worryin about some kid.
I hope it all works out for you (:
Good Luck xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): You are 13 years old. You may think you're man enough to handle this, but beleive me, YOU KNOW NOTHING. Do some serious years of growing up before you even consider having a girlfriend let alone a baby.
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A
male
reader, a_decent_1  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Your question in itself explains how immature you are... !! You knw anyone could get u arrested if u have a baby at this age...?
Stop being selfish.. !! All you would do is spoil a baby's life.. A baby needs food, money etc etc.. ! Where will you provide him that..? Moreover how can u be so sure at "13" about guy..? You'll find a BILLION by the time you turn 20.
Let alone the Pain and Pregnancy trouble... !!
I can't help but be Sad for Kids like you.. Really.. !!
G'day
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (2 January 2009):
Wow, that is such a selfish attitude!
You are going to bring a baby into a teenage relationship to underage parents whose grandparents will always see it as a problem. You are going to ruin her chances at life AND your own, just so you can be together!!!
If you really loved each other then you would wait this out, re-build some trust with her parents, do the hard work that is needed for this relationship to work.
Having a baby will seem like a quick fix, but it will solve nothing, it will make her parents hate you even more. It will make your parents think you are an idiot. It will make the baby's life a much harder one than it has to be. Her parents will probably give you access to the baby, but they don't have to let you see her any more than you do now. They'll have almost complete control of her life after this because she is going to need them to support her. It's not like you can move out and get a job when you have just had a baby.
As I said, the fact that you are willing to do something so stupid rather than put effort and time into this proves that you are not serious about each other long term at all and you just want instant results.
If you really want to be together forever, then back off, wait, she can get a job and move out, you can finish school and move out.
You need to give yourselves the best start you can in life because if you do decide to move in together against your parents wishes in a year or 3 then you will need decent school results to get a good enough job to pay the bills.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, Theusa  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 "I am 13 as well..."
First of I think that the age difference is not THAT big. 4 years apart means when ur 18, she's 22. which isn't bad...
But second of all! Poor baby! What do you think the baby will think when he grows up? "The reason why he was born is because you wanted to stay together" Babies SHOULD be born to this world because both parents are ready to feed him, take care of him[orher], give them lessons such as ballet or w.e wen they ask you for it...Not because it was the only waytoallow forbidden love. Perhaps u will love the baby but wat about ur studies? HER studies!? I don't think God would allow one of his beings to be yours just yet. Convince her not to do this! she could die by giving birth...keep that in mind...
If you two love each other, pray to God...He'll make a way...
Tip: if ur the girl's first, tell her to tell her parents this "He's my first love and my first time, allow us to be together because i know one day i'm going to regret leaving him just because you told me to..." then tell her to apologize that she loved...
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A
female
reader, nokutenda  +, writes (2 January 2009):
NO!!!
don't do it,you will only regret it later in life
you are still young and have a whole life ahead of you-if are meant to be with this girl you will be-baby or no baby
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A
female
reader, tumelo  +, writes (2 January 2009):
what kids, you Aare still a kid yourself, look if you were meant to be fate will always keep you guys together, having a child doesnt mean you will always be together, thats definately a bad idea, dont have kids to hold on to them,if they want to live they will leave ,,
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): Please. You are 13. Your girlfriend is 17. Think of the baby would want, not you. I don't mean whether you both want a baby since you obviously do, but whether that baby will be born into a situation that is healthy. You can't even provide for a baby at your age! Your parents will end up being the ones raising it. Just don't do it.
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