A
female
age
26-29,
*ptonGirl
writes:hey i`ve been really upset as today my mum told me that she had to give my cat poppy away i really loved this cat but my mum has a massive fear of birds and poppy brought them in every few days i walked in my room and i saw poppys cat hairs on my bed and i burst into tears i don`t think this sadness will ever go away. i don`t know what to do how do i get over this and did my mum do the right decision about giving her away ? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aching.with.sadness +, writes (14 November 2010):
my mum done the same thing to me 3 months ago.i feel so depressed and there isnt one day where i havent missed him sicne he left.theres so many songs that remind me of him and i cry at least once a day coz i just miss him so bad.i dont know what i can do to get him baq but i just feel lyk sharing my story with someone,and even as i write this i shed a few tears D;
A
female
reader, Holli' +, writes (12 January 2010):
 I don't think she should have given your cat away without talking to you, she could have asked that you clean up any birds that get baught in, it seems a little extream to give Poppy away. I have a huge fear of spiders and my puppy find them delishas but that dosen't stop me from smothering him in kisses every few minuets. I think what your mum did was wrong, you should talk to her and tell her how you feel.
Hope this helped.
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female
reader, UptonGirl +, writes (11 January 2010):
UptonGirl is verified as being by the original poster of the question thankyou x
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female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (11 January 2010):
 ...that is why they make collars with bells on them - to give the birds some fair warning!!!
Indoor cat is also leaping to mind!
There were solutions to this problem!
As an animal lover, I think it is an absolute disgusting cop out when people discard their pets coz they have issues that they cant be bothered solving. Imagine if we discarded children so easily.
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A
male
reader, Passthrough2  +, writes (11 January 2010):
Well, some of these replies seem a bit one-sided and some a bit extreme, so I'll defend the mother...Are you SURE it was your cat? Did you feed it every day, clean it's box (assuming it didn't just always use the outdoors), did YOU always pick up it's presents? Was it all your responsibility? Children (and teens) are normally not 100% certain on the properties of posession of pets and things which requirer maintenance.Some adults, my mother for example, have childhood fears they may NEVER get over, my mother was tormented with headless snakes, and as a result, has a very, very deep seated unreasonable fear of snakes, worms, and sometimes belts and ropes, catching her off guard. Not all cats catch and donate small animals, neither of my ourdoor cats did.But then again, it's surely something your mother should have discussed with you, but you need to be more understanding of phobias- Its not something which can be rationalized.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2010): Ok from another cat person. That was a jerk thing to do, especially without allowing you to be in on the decision to give her away or decide who would get the cat and especially not being allowed to say goodbye to the cat.
If I were you, I would demand that your mother tell you where she took the cat and ask her to get it back, that you will teach Poppy to be a happy indoor cat with a litter box and that you will be responsible for taking care of her and the box.
Cats stay healthier and live longer lives if they are kept indoors..as long as they have a window to look at to watch birds they are content to be indoors away from disease, dogs, cars and bad people who want to torture them.
You are old enough now that you can stand up for yourself against your Mom, of course you want to pick your battles but I think this is one of those that are worth fighting for. She really disrespected your feelings here and in my opinion even broke your trust. That is not good parenting and you need to say as much.
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male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (11 January 2010):
 wow thats horrible i would suggest not talking to your mom for a year, well thats what i would do, she was def wrong parents are so stupid sometimes, well guess you have to forgive her well actually i wouldnt spend the effort forgiving that one, but hey dont let it eat you up to bad im sure worst things will happen to you if you live long enough, cheer up, hey maybe you should get an account on dear cupid and help others to get your mind off it.
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A
female
reader, ForeverDawn +, writes (11 January 2010):
 I really understand what you feel I am an animal lover myself and about three years ago I had a cat named Charily I bottle fed this cat because he couldn't eat on his own when I fist got him he was so little I could hold him in the palm of my hand to make a long story short my mother gave him away it was very painful a lot of people don't understand how attached you can become to pets! The pain will fade don't worry but it will take a while and yes every now and then you will bump into something that will remind you of her but life will keep going!! I wish you the best and hope you feel better soon!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2010): my mum did something similar when i was younger - she just gave my cat away without even consulting me. I think its wrong because they are not just pets, you become attached to them and they are like family. I think it wrong that she gave your cat away - is there anyway you could still keep in contact with poppy, maybe visit the new people she lives with. I know you can't have her back and that your mum was wrong to do it how she did it but maybe knowing she is okay and being able to say goodbye may make it easier for you. I would never do this to my children - but like you said she had her reasons but still, parents are stupid sometimes.
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