A
female
age
36-40,
*aiveada
writes:So this is complicated, I was asked by one of my Professors like three semesters agao to join a Behavioral Philosophy Lab that he was going to start at school. One day he approached me and asked if i would like to join and he explained to me everything that we would do, like code data, read articles and try to publish an article. He told me that having an article published would increase my chances of getting into Grad school. So i told him if he had anyone else in mind, he immediately said no. So I agreed to be in the lab. our first meeting was in his office and it was for two to three hours. we talked about some probes for an article and we got off topic and talked about my life. so then the next time it was the same thing, but i felt uncomfortable and i asked him if he wanted to add more people and he said no. i asked him why but he didnt answer me. so finally i emailed him and said if we could work through email until we added more people. he emailed me back saying "we should take it easy, that there was a lack of space and time. I told him on space we could meet in the library but on time i didnt know. He then added three girls but we never met up for anything. it was always me and him. so then i started going to some coffee house events at the school and i turned and looked at the back he was standing there staring at me. SO the next day i went to see him i said man i am doing a lot of things and he said like what and i said i whent to my first coffee house, he imediately replied yes i know i saw you there. that to me seemed like a red flag. things just got wierder from there. I started dating a guy and he found out so he moved my name down on the website. It was his name mine and the other girls. but as soon as he found out that i broke up with my boyfriend he moved my name back up. then he would act like he was lost and didnt know which room was his class room. on aother occasion me and a friend were walking to wier and when we were getting close to the building he came out the side stairs of the building and asked if it was ok to go through the front, since at the time there was construction. i said yes and it was wierd because he was already in the building and he whent back in to use the elevator. the last time i talked to with him he asked me if i had gone back to my ex and i said no. i care for this professor like a father becuase he was there during some hard times. he knew about me loosing my virginity. and this semester when someone made a comment about loosing there virginity he broke down and cried in front of the class. the last time i saw him he told me to think and i told him i do think sometimes. he goes its the sometimes that worry me. So after these three semester i finally emailed him and told him i was ready to let go of the lab. and i am officialy out. I wonder if it was all in my head or could it be that my Professor had feelings for me?
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female
reader, naiveada +, writes (5 November 2009):
naiveada is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you again it really helped to see the wrong.
A
female
reader, naiveada +, writes (5 November 2009):
naiveada is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWow i agree i made a huge mistake, but i cant change that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 November 2009): I think your professor cared about you like a student and he gets a little over involved asking about your personal life, but he probably just wanted to know if you were alright or happy. I think the other things were just coincidences. His web page may be programmed to list names differently every time the page gets a hit, and it just looked like he would purposely move the names....that really does not make any sense to me why you would think he did it on purpose.
Professors often work with one bright student on a lab project rsearch project, he did not pick you because he had a crush on you, but because of your academic performance. He wanted to mentor you, sounds like to me, which is part of his job as a professor. He is required to have so much research and papers published in order to teach at the university, so this is a requirement of his job.
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