A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I am 46 years old and have been dating a man 53. He has never been married. His last relationship lasted 7 years she left him suddenly for another man and moved to another state. We have been dating for almost a year. I have asked if that relationship was over with her and was assured he was way over that. Well one night while I was sleeping he checked his email from my computer and didn't log off. I read all his emails back and forth to her that he still loved her and missed her and was not sleeping. I had no idea...we spent Christmas together in fact he had already told me he loved me. One of his emails to her stated his Christmas really sucked without her????????What???? I confronted him and he told me it was none of my business that was between them didnt concern me. I told him I did not want to continue this relationship, he was upset and asked if I was ok with him dating other women. I said yes and he shook my hand and left and have not heard from him since. Is this normal behavior from a man 53??? Why am I feeling so depressed? My gut feeling about him was right all along. Am I wrong for being upset that he obviously has feeling for his ex and is still not over her? He said he cannot believe I am ending our relationship over his ex. I ended the relationship because he is not an honest man....Any advise would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
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female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (12 October 2010):
You did the right thing. You should have gone with your gut feeling, and you're certainly not wrong in being upset over ending your relationship over his ex. You should never be the consolation prize for anybody. There is nothing more degrading to a woman, than being in a relationship with a man who is in love with someone else. Maybe this guy thinks its ok...thats why he says he cannot believe that you ended things like this. But you did the right thing. Let him sort out his issues first.
You're feeling depressed because you've been hurt by this man. Its very hurtful to know that despite your presence in his life and the fact that he said he loved you, he continues to pine for the other woman's absence. You deserve so much better...please do not settle for this.
All the best to you...love..
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you so much for your kind words. I really appreciate your help. Thanks again....
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A
female
reader, Auntie E +, writes (12 October 2010):
Oh Honey! Here is what you wrote - in your own words: "My gut feeling about him was right all along." That is why you are so upset! You did not listen to your gut (been there done that) and it's the worst feeling - you are upset with yourself. Don't let this guy back into your life - you will only get more of the same bullshit from him - and that's about all you will get. Move on. A woman like you (who knows her "gut") deserves better. Learn from this. It will be ok.
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