A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:my ex and i split up around 2 month ago then out of the blue i got a missed call now this was a new number i had sent to him in a letter, so didnt expect it to be in his phone. anyway i text out of sheer curiosity friendly casually say hey did you mean to call he replies instantly no. think you should delete my number. im puzzled as i dont have his number i didnt contact him, whats going on here? so i tell him just that and perhaps its him who should delete my number instead. he says hes doing it now needs to move on. so im crushed but i hold it together and calmly reply back saying that if thats what he needs and wants to do ok take care then. as i had previously wrote him a heart felt letter to which i got no reply i wasnt going to try convince him otherwise. this part is whats stuck in my head.. he replies instantly that's what has happened OK Likewise. so what was the whole point in this missed call and text to hurt me further to say he'd moved on? can someone help me understand and advise me on what to do i miss him so much my heart is breaking.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): You need to let things settle and do nothing for a while. It may be that in a moment of doubt he gave you a call, but regretted it. You wrote him a letter. And you responded to the missed call. So he knows you are still very much thinking of him. The last thing you want to do is appear needy or that you can't let go. My advice is, even if you are breaking up inside, get on with life. Don't contact him. There is an attractive quality to an ex who is confidently moving on. He may or may not get in contact with you. But do your sense of well being and dignity a favour - what if you send me a text and get on reply? No, 'appear' to be moving on and may be that will help you in the short term anyway.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): Well i do not exactly know the scene that exists between you both. However if he has saved ur number it is definitely a good sign. One thing that u need to promise yourself first is that u will not compromise ur self respect or chase him in any way. Be urself. If he loved u earlier chances are he still has some feelings for u. So here is wat i suggest u do. Send him a casual. Very CASUAL text msg. Do not call or write anything intense in ur text. Send something like a hi wats up kind of msg. Chances are he will respond. If he doesnt then do not contact him again until he does. If he replies maintain a light conversation. Joke around. Do not get too personal. Make ur life seem as excitin as possible instead of lettin him know ur miserable without him. See how it goes and then u can consider wat to do next. Hope i cpuld be of help :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwhat advice can you give me ?i want to try again but i dont know where to start so confused and unhappy :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): Heywell what are the chances that maybe since he aint able to get over it after 2 months he wants to give it another shot? I am not 100 percent sure here bt looks like he wanted to hear it dat u are still interested so he could suggest a patch up? Guys are never good with words n they have a terrible ego problem. Maybe u shud analyse his behaviour a lil more carefully. He didnt call to hurt u. He is hurtin himself :)
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