A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Lately i,ve been hanging around with one of my guy friends and i think he really likes me. We hold hands the whole time , we hug each other in a way you would only see couples cuddle , we comfort each other bout everything and we both had painful relationships. But his ex is still haunting him. He wants to part as friends but shes being a bitch about it. the other day the ex and her boyfriend where walking towards us and i had to pull my friend away because i knew there would be a fight. He was mad at me and admitted he still had feelings for her but he hates her at the same time. The problem is they broke up last new years and he took it bad. I,m developing feelings for him and i want us to become something but is it possible with this problem?
View related questions:
broke up, his ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (14 December 2010):
It is, but wait. Otherwise, he won't have the time to deal with his feelings and get over her. Instead, he will distract himself by using you and his developing feelings for you. Then, later down the road, he'll find himself not over his ex and it will complicate your relationship. So give him more time.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2010): ~BEARER OF HEART ACHE NEWS~Sweetie, please...for your own emotional wellbeing and preservation of your heart...immediately...I repeat...immediately...cease all intimate contact with him like cuddling, etc...and...it's okay to remain his friend but distance yourself some as I can see you have developed stronger than friend emotions for him...and equally do not believe for one second that he feels the same way about you.How do I know? I am in the shoes of your friend. I cuddled with a friend, held hands..etc...like level one intimacy...and not once did I even get feel any romantic desire or emotions about her when we did it...and she knew this....you see we had an understanding...heck I was imagining she was my ex and vice versa so there was never an issue.But with you...no...no...it is not the same as my situation.I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, but he is so not over his ex...and more than likely he's pretending you are his ex in his head.I don't do this anymore as all it was doing was keeping me from properly trying to disconnect. This is what you're friend will need to do before he can take on a healthy relationship in the future...and I assure you it's not going to happen anytime soon...heck he still freaks out with jealosy and anger.Do both yourself and him a favor and step away...remain his friend...but just that...you don't want him to end up twisting all the dysfunction that going on in his head behind heartbreak to irrationally but possibly resent you.Give him the space and time he needs to just be alone and not even be hassled about love or relationship or dating or just nothing having to involve an association of such.I know what he's going through...as I am too...so please sweetie, just know it has nothing to do with you. He really needs your supoort as just a platonic friend.Who knows..you two might end up even married...but I can assure you now is the worst time to even persue it.God Bless.
...............................
|
