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female
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*hawna
writes: I had brought the idea of having a threesome to my boyfriend. I have been with girls before and it doesn't bother me. He said that it could be fun and asked if I wanted him to join or stay out of it. I told him to join. We have spoke to the other girl and she like the idea as well. Her and myself have "liked" each other. I want to make sure I don't make a bad choice. Should I do this?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): My husband and I have had 2 threesomes in the past, one with a girl and one with a man. It was a lot of fun and caused no problems in our relationship. Then again, we have a very strong and intimate thing going on.
I think if your relationship is good, it should be ok. If your relationship is not strong, it can tear it apart.
I'd like to try it again. :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2008): I had just had a threesome on new years because my fiance is going to Iraq and it has always been his fantasy. So for his going away present i told him to invite a girl from work to his house. All three of us were drunk and i was having second thoughts about it. I said yes anyway and ever since i have been feeling that he likes her more than me. They have been sending each other texts since then and i don't suggest it if both parties are very familiar with each other.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2007): I'm in a similiar situation.i used to have threesomes on a regular basis and actually met my partner through it when i joined him for his first ever threesome with the girl he used to see. now the topic has come up again and he has found a very discreet girl that would like to join us, no strings attached.I dont have a problem as she is less attractive than me and a lot bigger too, but thats what is the problem for me. in the past ive always had threesomes were i;m attracted to both parties involved and she is so far off the mark. its happening on the weekend and i'm afraid i will have to get very drunk for it to happen.my partner knows my fears and has reassured me that he has chosen her so that i dont feel inscure about him doing the same thing that happened between us. i enjoy threesomes and because i love him i will take part.you have to follow your heart.lifes to short. x
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2006): Had my first with my wife & a long term friend on Saturday - Started after my wife went to bed early as she had had too much to drink. We were left down stairs playing cards & one thing led to another - My wife & I had discussed a threesome & often fantasies about it while in bed. It was great, the image of two beutiful bodies kissing will remain with me forever. I declined the offer of having full sex with our new partner but happily licked & kissed her body, watching as her & my wife kissed & touched each other. Discussed what had happened in the morning & were all ok with it, also with my wife later, who was clear she had very much enjoyed what had happened but was not `gay' also that it had made her sexually confident knowing her body was desired by her friend. Maybe it will happened again, maybe not but I will die a happier man for it. Like parchuting do it once in your life
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2006): depends on how you both look at it, if you are both ok with and can handle the issues that may arise, then go for it, however, if either of you feel slightly uneasy about the situation the best bet is not to go for it unless you are.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2006): We've just lost one of the girls after a long term threesome. It was great. No rows because the third always acts as referee for the other two. For the women, there is no closer friendship than one that is intimate. For the guy, it's like being supercharged and walking into a bar with two women is such an ego trip.
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A
female
reader, CherylAhmed13 +, writes (9 January 2006):
if you love him dont do it. you will ruin everything. crushes and sexual feelings comen and go but love is not something easy to find. dont screw it up!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2006): Me and my boyfriend were in a relationship for about half a year and i lost my virginity to him 3 months into it...and im into a lot of wierd things and i wanted to have a threesome with this girl i liked....and well he at first didnt want to share me...but then he gave in...well i brought her home and all then when it came time to do it....i freaked......i started thinkin about the what ifs...what if he likes the way she looks,tastes,moves, sounds etc. more than me? what if she turns him on more ? but he told me how it was my idea we dont have to its up to me...and well i gave in ....and honestly it was great...for me....he didnt like her at all...ahah weve been together for a year now and ....i still get the images of her on him...but his eyes on me...and he assured me he loved me and no matter how many people we sleep with it could never change they way he loves me....its all in good fun...you just have to be secure and confindent in yourself and the relationship....if you truly love each other nothing shall ever come between you...
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A
female
reader, mommasarah +, writes (18 October 2005):
Don't do it. I was in this same situation about 9 months ago and I did it. Now every time I look at him and we are fighting or he has been out drinking all I can see is this woman sitting on his face. I cannot get over it. We are now married and I have extreme trust issues with him. I know I made the choice to, but the visuals will never leave your head- whether you agreed to it or not. If you want to marry this man and love him, don't risk it!
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (7 October 2005):
 If threesomes turn you on, I think you'd be better off just viewing a video rather than actually participating in it. It WILL come back to bite you in the butt, so to speak.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2005): I'm not for or against menage a trois..as everyone differs on sexual attitudes, but there are some things to think about first. Fulfilling certain fantasies by bringing other people into your private sex life is another way of making things interesting and fun-but unfortunately, threesomes can be risky. Sex between two people in love, is an deep, meaningful emotional adventure as well as a physicaaly satisfying event. Involving other people in your very private sex life can be an emotionally charged experiment that could backfire, bigtime! Often one partner becomes a little more involved or enthusiastic and jealousy and insecurities will wreak havoc on your relationship. Depending on your level of self esteem and trust in your partner, threesomes could make one of you feel threatened. If you are not secure in your partner's attraction to you, seeing them attracted to and turned on by another person could be devastating. Similarly, the opportunity to see your bf having sex with someone else, may not be as much of a turn on if you are insecure about your own body or sexual technique and can't help but compare yourself unfavourably with others. Your self esteem would need to be able to cope with the constant possibility of rejection. Everyone has different tastes-could you cope with not fitting theirs?
For some couples this is just a part of the adventuresome perspective they have on sex and the relationship may not suffer at all and may actually be strengthened. For some couples this sort of activity occurs as a way to satisfy the bisexual orientation of one of the partners in the relationship. For some, it is a one-time experiment and for others it is a lifestyle (swinging). But for any experimentations involving other people in your sex life, it will only succeed if the couple usually has a fairly strong commitment to each other.
Just some things to think about. Talk openly and honestly with your bf and the other person you want in this threesome and lay all your cards on the table. Make sure you all practise safe sex. But most of all...make absolutely sure YOU want to do this. If you are having any doubts whatsoever...don't do it! It could mess up your relationship and you'll have some huge regrets.
Hugs, Irish
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reader, pops +, writes (7 October 2005):
Be very careful what you wish for: you may just get it. Many relationships do not survive extra sexual partners, no matter the format. It does not sound like you have really discussed this with your bf, or the girl. Take it slow, and talk to them both, individually, and then together, before deciding to go forward. Having bi-sexual affairs is a lot different than sharing a lover with another person. Ask your bf if he would still participate if you asked him to share you with another man. I suspect that will get him really thinking about what you are proposing to do. And, how ready would your gf be if you were going to share her with another woman, or invite two men to have sex with the pair of you?
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reader, schlottjl +, writes (7 October 2005):
 NOOO! oh wait- not unless you are trying to end this relationship and it appears you are. You are inviting your boyfriend to cheat on you. You will forever picture him with her and compare or worry you don't please him like she does. He will become fixated on needing other people than you to get him off and if your friend is not gay, you could be deceiving her and putting your reputation at risk.
If you are interested in marriage or family someday, plan to move far far away. While guys are into the slutty sex, they rarely respect those who participate. And if you ever have kids, and this experience didn't ruin everything for you, you will be fixated on inappropriate sex and not really connecting to another. And it is thru really connecting with a mate that deeper levels of happiness reside. But then again....
If you want out of everything and think you are not killing your soul bit by bit, go for it. I don't think you will turn back now anyway. Just remember, what sounds good in our fantasy is not necessarily what is good in reality. Sometimes there is a reason to keep it in your dreams.
Good Luck and think about this before you make or break your future.
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