A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Sorry this is a bit long, but I wanted to put all the detail in. So I've been with my boyfriend for about 8 months now. When we first got together I really loved him (I had liked him way before we got together). But recently I don't feel anything towards him, I just don't love him anymore. And the worst part is I don't really know why, it's just everything he does seems to irritate me. He is quite immature and I am alot more mature than him, so maybe it's that. I keep making excuses not to see him, on the days when I know I'm seeing him later on I feel a sense of dread almost. I feel so bad because he hasn't done anything wrong. Another thing that makes me feel guilty is he has spent quite a bit of money on me, altough I never wanted him to because I'm not like that. And now I feel guilty about that as well. I especially don't want people thinking that I was just with him for the money. But I really don't know what to do, I'm no longer happy being with him, but I feel so guilty for feeling this way. Also I'm a very busy person, I am dedicated to my work and I'm struggling to balance this and him. Someone please help me, because I don't want to hurt him, but i'm not happy anymore. Thanks for Reading all this xxxxx
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): Thankyou, for all your help. I've been talking to my best friend about it (as before I didn't tell anyone what I was feeling) she says the same thing. You've all been very helpful xxxx
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (1 February 2012):
 Sometimes we just grow apart from friends and lovers, it's not uncommon and not making you a bad person.
Do what is right for you and end it.
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A
female
reader, xxxAislingxxx +, writes (31 January 2012):
hi,
I think you should ask for a break so you can concentrate on your work as you are just too busy for a relationship at the moment. then after a few weeks gather your thoughts and if you want to be with him you will know after those few weeks apart if not just say the time you have spent away from him has made you realise that ye dont have as much in common as you once thought and you feel its not going to work out.
I hope this has helped you.
Best of luck
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2012): Yes that's true, thankyou. I just don't want to hurt him, and the longer I leave it the more it's going to. Thankyou xx
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A
female
reader, AbigailBradbury  +, writes (31 January 2012):
 The other person who has replied to this hit the nail on the head.
You're not a bad person, sometimes feelings do just go, despite what people may say.
You do need to end this if you don't feel love anymore.
You don't want to end it as you don't want to be cruel? But isn't it more cruel to string him along and let him think you still love him?
Explain that you do not want to hurt him at all but you're just not feeling it anymore. Tell him exactly what you've put on here.
It'll be fine. Just break it to him gently xx
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (31 January 2012):
I think it sounds like the relationship has gone as far as it can. What's probably happened is that you've matured somewhat, and he's not matured enough for you.
I think the best thing you can now do is leave him, move forward with your own life and meet new people. It doesn't matter how much he's spent on you. What matters is that you do the right thing for you both. You know deep down that this is over, and you also know that to stay with him will only hurt him more.
I suggest that you end it nicely, and move on.
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