A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:About 2 weeks ago I met a guy he was gr8. I liked him I thought he liked me, well I did it. I had sex with him . We never went out on a date, after our first time together he brought up us being together. I was down with it so now he is my boyfriend, well i go to his place sex again.. this happens a few times.. But i noticed he only called and text me when i would call or text him first.. So i decided to back off see what happens. Havent heard from him in 2 days.. Was he using me??
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 March 2009): Wow. 2 weeks. No dates. Not even a milkshake, and you're pointing your toes to the ceiling?! Is he using you? Are kidding me? Of course, he is. BF, you call him? I'd call him your "John", but it sounds like he hasn't give you so much as a mint, so I wouldn't even raise him to that level. Bootie call is more like it. If you like it, so be it. But he's not your BF. And he will never be your BF because you have given him no reason to respect you. None.
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (22 March 2009):
 Yes, but everyone who knows someone essentially uses the other for something, whether it be friendship, love, sexual satisfaction, income, labor, shelter, family or other. Sounds that your boyfriend is simply using you for sex. If you enjoy it, so be it.
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A
female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (22 March 2009):
 yeah, he could be only turning to you for sex because he didn't have to work hard at getting. no offense.
If you want a relationship become a little less unavailable. Look at his actions. Some guys will say you guys are a couple but in their mind only call you when they need you. So don't make the first move and see what happens
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2009): No, not all guys are the same but if you keep sleeping with them before you even date them, their reaction to you will be. Most won't take you seriously and end up blowing you off. If you want things to change, change your approach to relationships.
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A
male
reader, Mr Me +, writes (21 March 2009):
 Sad to say, it could be very plausible that he is using you if you always have to make the first contact. 2 days, however, may not be long enough to tell.
This is my suggestion to you (I'm not a girl, so this may not be the BEST thing to do, haha). Stop calling him, texting him, or talking to him in general unless he makes the first contact. If it doesn't happen, then, yes, I would say he is using you and you have already provided yourself a way out by not communicating with him.
Another thing you could do is try going over to his place, but don't offer anything up. If he gets really upset that you aren't offering sex or anything, then he's just using you as a booty call, in my opinion.
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