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Unprotected sex that I didn't want, now what?

Tagged as: Gay relationships, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 April 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 April 2010)
A male Australia age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I am gay and without me realising ended up having unprotected anal sex. I am freaking out! Sorry for the details but here they are...

Things were moving along and I sat up to put a condom on myself and he was like we're not f***ing yet, so I laid back down, and next thing I know I am inside him. WHO DOES THAT!? I didn't realise at first and then I was just so shocked that my mind almost shutdown. Then I got my act together and said I want to put a condom on and he was like you're in now, why bother, and it was all then too late anyway as I came in him and him on my chest.

This is so wrong. I didn't want that and from me sitting up etc he knew I wanted to wear a condom. It is just not okay. It probably isn't but it seems criminal to me.

Worse still he then freaked out that I'd come inside him (after I tried to put a condom on twice) with some warped perception that sex without one was safe as long as I didn't come and that I had taken a liberty by coming. He ran to the toilet and shower and then believed he'd be fine. That scares me even more!

According to him before we started, when we were all clothed, he'd just got test results back showing him all clean. After he left I texted and asked if he had slept with anyone since having the blood taken for the test and he said no which I hope is the truth. He quizzed me on my sexual health before we started and actually seemed aphrensive about catching something to which I was like well I always wear a condom (another time I mentioned condom!).

I know these won't remove the risk but it was quite quick, lots of lube and saliva, clean looking afterwards, my penis is in good order before and after (no cuts or anything like that) and he took it easy and wouldn't have strained as I didn't even realise at fist I was in him.

Obviously I will go to the doctor ASAP but is there anything else I should do!?

So so scared and unhappy.

View related questions: anal sex, condom, my penis, text

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A male reader, AvgGuy1 United States +, writes (30 April 2010):

AvgGuy1 agony aunt

1. Go get tested - just to make sure you're all ok. TOPS can catch bugs too. Just to maintain your own bit of sanity.

2. From now on, obey the golden rule - No Glove, No Love! It's that simple.

As for HIM freaking out, because you shot inside him, well... that's MOSTLY his own fault. I mean YOU knew when you were going to cum, you could have pulled out. But, it's more his fault for not letting you put a condom on to begin with.

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A female reader, raiders United States +, writes (26 April 2010):

raiders agony auntJust remember that you can never be to careful, always wear a party hat, always think on you and you should be your first priority health wise. Get checked for STD's very important that you get tested for HIV please be careful when having sex with anyone, good luck and I hope all your results come back negative.

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