A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi im a 22 year old lady with a 21 year old boyfriend, we had sex and the condom broke so we think i might be pregnant, this will be my first child and im looking foward to having it but he is telling me that he is not ready! What do i do because I don't want to lose him and i dnt want to lose my bby either and i do not support abortion I hate it!!!!!What do i do please help
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female
reader, PerhapsNot  +, writes (29 March 2012):
 If you are indeed pregnant, make a list of why you would have an abortion. If your boyfriend's disinterest in having a child and wanting to pacify him is the only and primary reason to have an abortion, then don't do it. If you get an abortion, will you ever look at your boyfriend the same way again? Would you not blame him for the guilt and the entire decision at some point in your life? What if you were to break up? Could you live in peace knowing you abored a child in hopes to keep your boyfriend, but then he left you in the future anyway? Never allow a man to dictate your decision when it comes to these very serious issues. This is YOUR body. No one is aborting anything from his body, nor does he have a physical and emotional connection to the baby that you do. Life and death decision are the worst and the most difficult decisions that a person has the displeasure of making. Talk to your parents, your friends and people that care about you. Then look at what you want. You're the one that will have to live with this decision for the rest of her life - whether it be aborting, adoption, or raising it on your own, or with your boyfriend. Just make sure whatever decision you make, you can live it in good conscience and no regrets in the future.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (29 March 2012):
 EVERYTHING Cindy said.
just because a condom breaks does not mean you got pregnant... have you taken a pregnancy test yet?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (29 March 2012):
 First, don't fret before having the result of your pregnancy test, you are not SURE yet you got pregnant.
Second, make up your mind, and stay true to yourself and to your values. If you REALLY do not support abortion and you hate it, then this should be a no brainer : you 'll just have the baby , - you won't turn your ethics upside down just to "keep " a 21 y.o. boy that ,most probably, wouldn't be with you regardless in a couple of years ( sorry, not being mean, it's just statistics, and life : boyfriends come and go- and children stay :).
Of course, if you don't want to abort and you can't take proper care of a child now , you can consider adoption .
Note that this is being said from someone that is pro-choice and for whom abortion is no big moral taboo, I think that in many circumstances it is a sad necessity- and a wise choice. But that's MY opinion, not yours , and I am not the pregnant one. I confess I am always a bit surprised when people is so energically pro-life...until it happens to them, THEN they have doubts and hesitations. For which, in theory, there should be no room for.
In case it was just a pregnancy scare, well, now you know that condoms break some times, and it's always smarter to also use other contracception ( pill, IUD, etc...)
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