A
male
age
30-35,
*ilveknifex
writes: The girl I love is still in love with her ex, and she's going to talk to him, what do I do? (10 Points)!?So tonight we talked on the phone, basically I told her how I felt, I'm in love with her, but right now she's out of a three year relationship, where she is afraid to let go of the love for him, after he did treat her and neglect her and she was tired of crying, but for some reason she cannot get over him, we recently started going out, and she said she does like me and I'm like the perfect guy and she cares so much about me, and she doesn't want to hurt me, she explained to me she cannot get over him, and thinks it's dumb she might be in love with a guy who cares nothing about her any more, (i agree) but didn't say anything, so she said, what she thinks she needs is a break so she can find out what's going on, I asked her, if she felt things didn't work out, she would come and actually have room to love me and she said yah, So tomorow she's going to try to talk to him, and see where her heart lies, I'm kinda reluctant to let her do this, but it's the only way she will get over him, since everyone is so closely associated with him around her, she cannot just delete him from her world, it hurts me and I'm scared, but I know I told her to do what's right for her, I love her and care about her, **** my emotionsWHAT CAN I DO?
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2009): Ugh, why would she seek a relationship if she knew she still loved this guy?
She has already hurt you. No getting around that, just by her saying she still loves him must be a stab to your heart.
:( I feel badly for you because you seem so kind when you honestly should be extremely upset.
What I suggest you do is the following: You take some time to yourself and think about if you want to share your heart with someone who cannot decide whether they want to be with you. Decide if you really want to live in someone's shadow.
I realize that you love her, but you should really be thinking about your own well-being. This is hard. I hope that you don't read this and just kind of blow it off, but instead really think about your life and what you want out of it. I sincerely believe that you need to find someone who will love you without a second thought. A girl who will look into your eyes and desire you and only you. A girl who will tell you she loves you and means it with every fiber of her being.
Good luck :)
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