A
female
age
36-40,
*ove!?!
writes:Im in a difficult position, I recently asked my boyfriend whether he thought we would still be together in the future, so we could make plans. His answer was I hope so but I cant promise I will still love you then, and to stop planning for the future. Im devestated as I thought he was the one, I moved away from my family and friends to be with him and moved in with him and his mum. Im scared that He doesnt truly love me and feel trapped as I have a good job but would have no home if we split up.We are both in our early twentys and been together nearly 3 years. His mum had a breakdown when his dad had an affair and left her. Is he scared of commitment or is this relarionship doomed? I love him so much but I dont want 2 be with him If he doesnt feel the same.
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a break, affair, moved in, split up, trapped Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2008): Hi ThereI think he loves you very very much but maybe he's very scared of commitment. A guy in his 20s thinks very differently to a girl in their 20s. Like you mentioned, maybe he is scared of upsetting his mum. She seems to have issues and maybe relies on your boyfriend a little too heavily. It seems! My advice is spend time with him, enjoy being with each other and give it 6 months or so and see where things are then. Are you happy with all other departments of the relationship??
A
female
reader, MissWendlemoot  +, writes (3 September 2008):
 If you have a good job, then find an apartment and move out.
Please don't buy a house with him either.
If he doesn't know after 3 years if he wants a future with you, then he doesn't.
Best wishes xo
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A
female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (3 September 2008):
 Id say dont move in together i had the same problem with my boyfriend the thought of moving in etc just put so much pressure etc id say why move in just yet. Sort things out before you make that big commitment....make sure its something you both want equaly! But serious dont rush to move in together as there really is no rush and it does not make a relationship any stronger or show its any stronger!
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A
female
reader, love!?! +, writes (3 September 2008):
love!?! is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe rented for 6 months after being 2gether for 7 months and tried 2 buy a house, it fell through so we moved in with his mum 2 save money. He still wants 2 buy a house together but im worried if he cant offer me a future wouldnt I be stupid 2 buy a house with him?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2008): I don't think you need to break up with him, but why would you leave your family to move in with a boy who can't even support himself? You should move out of his mom's place and gain some independence. Does he have plans to move out of his mom's house?
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