A
female
age
30-35,
*ee_123
writes:Hello!So long story short, I'm 21, my boyfriend broke up with me about two months ago, and it was extremely painful and around the end of April I started to try and get back into the dating game. There's this guy (we'll call him T) that I worked with for two years, last summer and the Fall before that (but we both don't work at said place anymore). And I recalled that T used to flirt with me a little bit, except I always kept it at bay because I was with my boyfriend at the time, but we were still friendly and funny together at work. So I had thought of T and decided to strike up a conversation on FB. He was nice, writing really funny responses but I noticed that he wasn't asking me about my life etc. So, no one even said goodbye in the conversation, it literally just died down, so I began to feel crappy because after the breakup with my boyfriend, it was just like....double rejection. Then I decided to go on Tinder (haha) and for a little while I would talk to some guys, but then one day while passing and liking different profiles, T's popped up! I was so taken back, and I didn't know what to do, so instead of liking or passing, I simply closed the app and restarted it. It wasn't until last Saturday that his face popped up again and I thought, what are the chances? So, I decided to like his profile, and immediately the app said that we were matched (meaning, he had obviously liked me first). He then starts the conversation and he's super excited and then he says, "I thought you had a boyfriend, no?" To which I replied, "We're not together anymore." And then he said, "Ah sorry about that. His loss." So then we started talking about school etc. and once again I felt like I was the one who was trying to save the conversation, because it died down AGAIN when he had asked me a question and I gave a simple answer, but he didn't reply back. Four hours later, I decided to take matters into my own hands and started up the conversation again, and then he started talking again too, and it seemed a little more lively after I said something really funny and then he had said, "Ah man, I missed you. I can just hear you saying that....(and then said some other stuff about him going on a trip to Asia in August and telling me when he's going). So I told him, "Aw thanks, missed you too! :) Here's my number_____, let's hangout sometime!:)" Now about five hours later on Sunday night, I get a text from him saying "Giving your number to strange tinder guys, eh?" Anyways, so we've been flirting back and forth for the passed three days and we stealthly/sneakily called each other cute, although I know he's still on Tinder. Yesterday he wasn't really writing answers as long as he normally does, but he was still asking me questions about my work and stuff, but then he had a funny response to what I said but it was so miniscule that I couldn't really elaborate (by now it was 11:45pm last night) so I decided to say something funny back and then told him goodnight. He then replied with, "Goodnight :)". Now my question is, how long do I wait for him to strike up a new conversation, like the thing is, I wrote "let's hangout sometime" about three days ago, so I don't know if he hasn't asked me out because he's trying to get a feel for me..? Or what? And I really want to try with T because I know that we're really fun when we're together, and honestly, he's the first guy that my heart is actually willing to open upto after my ex boyfriend. So what should I do? Is it a lost cause, or is there a chance he could message me again? Thanks for your time!PS. Responses from men would be greatly appreciated too!-Tara
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at work, broke up, flirt, my ex, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2015): dude, it's been three days! chill out.
Sounds like you are over analysing it a bit. If you don't hear from the guy maybe text at the weekend or something if you want, to see how he is? But if he doesn't reply leave it! If people are really interested they make the time to contact you.
I know everyone gets over things differently (and depends how long/serious your last relationship was) but my friend's ex recently broke up with him, it was a serious relationship and he has dived back into dating way too soon,he is totally going crazy over every text message and it has been a disaster so far! Just be sure you've given yourself enough of a breather and are not trying to hard to fill the void of the previous relationship.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2015): You might be reading far to much into this because nothing has happened. Youre the one wanting more,giving out numbers,but he has given out no indication hes anything more than friendly.Dont give out anymore,hold back and get on with real life a bit more.
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