A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:OK here the thing, there is three guys that i talk to and kind of like. The first guy lets call him playmate, he has a girlfriend but we fool around often. We haven't had sex and we haven't had oral sex either. I gave him a hand job and he has fingered me and sucked on my boobs. We text and talk on the phone... more than i want to. He calls my phone a lot and leaves numerous voicemails, and if i don't reply to his txts right away he texts me until i do reply. But i don't really like him, but when i see him talking to other girls i get kinda mad not jealous. But when i see him with his girlfriend i don't really care, because i know im messing around with him and she is the one getting cheated on... i know it sounds bad...Then the second guy lets call him mixed signals. i really like him, we don't fool around or nothing, just flirt. He acts different towards me when his friends are around. when it's just me and him talking his nice and sweet and makes me laugh (a lot), but when his friends come along his aggressive. He says things like "come over here to daddy" and "we had fun last night, didn't we". He slaps me on the butt and pulls my hair (in a sexual way)...The third guy lets call him nice guy. I kinda like him, we have known each other for about 4 years now. We hold hands sometimes and i have kissed him twice, but thats all. He would be a good boyfriend and he's a cutie, but i think other people just couldn't see us together. He nice and sweet but sometimes he grabs my butt or trys to but hes hands down my pants. I kind of like all these guys but i don't know if i should go for any of them. They all make me happy, but i don't know which one to choose. I would love it very much for someone to give me honest advice.
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 November 2010):
 Hmmm slim pickings here, let me break it down for you..
The Playboy: Let's see he already has a girlfriend when he's messing around with you. That's called cheating, so in reality we should be labeling him the cheater. Plus, you don't even really like him. That rules him out.
The Chauvinist Pig: I know I'm being a little harsh, he's just being one of the boys around his friend..but still that's no excuse for acting disrespectful towards you. I can see him making up stories about you to his friends just to make him look like a "man" but then his friends are too talkative and word gets around school. Pretty soon you got a bad rep due to rumors. This could be very bad.
The Nice One with Idle Hands: He's nice, holds your hand, kisses you in public..but then he gets a little too forward with grabbing your butt or trying to shove his hands down your pants. This guy seems like the better choice of the 3, but then again he's letting his hormones take over..I could see him pushing you into having sex too soon.
In my opinion, I wouldn't pick any of them. But if I had to choose one, then I would go with the third one, after you give him the "I want to wait" talk..In other words, keeping your idle hands to kissing, hand holding and be respectful of my decision on waiting to engage in sexual activities.
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