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female
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anonymous
writes: **Hey Cupid's**Am I slut?I don't want to think I am. I can justify myself.There is this guy who has lust me for quiet a while, at least 2 years. He's been very close to me, friend wise. I have told him everything and I confide in him. At the moment I am having some money problems. I HAVE NO ONE TO GO TO FOR THIS! believe me if there was another way to get money I'd do it (i don't qualify for a lonely and i have no family members) anyway This guy Jared has offered to help me out with money and i am to pay him back. I will do so over time and in cash but at the moment he wants me to sleep with him to get the money. I'm okay witht his, I do like him, he want's to help me out. Jared's best friend (who i had also confided in about my money problems) told me Jared is doing this so he can be close to me. Jared treats me well and our current relationship is like best friends with benefits - in public we are best friends but when i need something i "earn" it. the two of us are okay with this money thing. i think psycholgically it brings us together becuase we do love each other and i really am falling for him.But is this wrong? am i slut? is he someone who's paying for sex from me becuase he wants me so bad? why is he doing this? and why am i letting him?i love him, i'm okay with it but i still feel guilty and dirrrty.**Thx**
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2007): This is prostitution. So the question is, do I want to be a prostitute and sell myself and lower the worth of women everywhere?
A
female
reader, beentheredonethat +, writes (12 October 2006):
 Well I guess your could be a slut....but sluts do it for free and with lots of Men because they LIKE to. I am a slut.
A whore does it for money...but now if you have to pay him back too...then sex is just the interest and the balance is still payable to him.
Also are we talking about a small sum of money or a huge sum. you know 100,000 pounds is worth a little nookie on the side....but like 100 bucks...well I think if you talk to a few of the ladies working the truck stops...or boulevards that 100 bucks is the going rate for a blow job...unless your willing to go with one of those crack smoking girls and then it's in the neighbor hood of 20 bucks. I would find out exactly what the local ladies charge for each act and That is exactly what he would pay. Oh and don't forget your tip. Oh and if his buddy is in on the knowledge of this arrangement...plan on expecting Him to be tossing that out. " wouldn't you like to do twice the work for the price of one?"
It reminds me of the joke..
a man walks into a bar and sits down next to a beautiful woman and kindly says..."lady you are the most beautiful woman I have ever scene...If I wrote you a check for a million dollars would you sleep with me?"
She thinks for a minute and says... "Is the check any good?"
"It is 100% sound....I own a multimillion dollar company and I can afford such an indulgence."
She says "yes..I will sleep with you for a million dollars!"
He says. "Ok...would you sleep with me for five dollars?"
She says..."No...what kind of girl do you think I am?"
He says. "Lady we have established that...now we are haggling over the price."
Don't accept the loan until you have haggled over the price. And if the loan is to keep you out of jail or to pay for your kidney dialysis then absolutely take the loan and pay it back how ever you can. If its for a pair of Pradas that you must have....Be a gold digging floozy and make him buy them for you....as a present. LOL Best luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2006): at least agree a wage, he may drive your earning power down sneakily so get a fixed rate wage. this will help stabalise your self esteem and bank balance. you seem the logical one as we all wood like to have our cake and eat it/ kill two birds with one stone. apply for a small business loan from your bank as you have that old entrepreneur flair, you go girl
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A
female
reader, sleepysly +, writes (10 October 2006):
 hi, sounds like you both like each other so why not get together it sorts both your problems out,he gets the girl he likes and you will get the help you need from your boyfriend. unfortunatly theres only one name for women who sleep with men for money,and you should not get used to that behaviour. talk to him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2006): Let's see.. Jared and you love each other. You need money and he has it. But in order for you to get the cash, you have to have sex with him? And on top of that, you still have to pay him back. He sounds like a guy who plays with people's lives and grabs any and all opportunities to control, degrade and demean others. You would be a fool to agree to such a bargain. Look what you have to give up (self-respect, dignity) in order to have this money. Friends do unselfish things for each other. If he was a friend, he would care and simply loan you the money..sans the sex. Are you that desperate and needy to have a relationship with this jerk, you'd stoop to this level? And what about him? Do you honestly believe a man who would ask such a thing of you...does he really really love you? Think again. Jared is a very selfish, uncaring boy. Jared is not your friend..don't kid yourself. Just the way I see it..good luck, dear.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2006): Whatever works for you. Really, whatever others may think you are, you don't really need to care so much. In the end, it's what you want/like to do, and what you're getting back in return - whatever that may be.
It's easy to say don't do this and that, and it's another one's perspective to say you are this and that, but heck, if you don't like it, don't do it. If you like it, the sex is good, and you want to use sex as a means to 'pay' him back, then whatever. Your life - your problems. It's harmless to everyone else right?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 October 2006): He's paying you to have sex with him. That's what happens with prostitutes. Not classing you with them, but if you feel guilty and dirty, why ARE you allowing this?
I don't think you are okay with it. You're bringing down your own self-esteem, and he's taking advantage.
If you need money, why not go out and get a part-time job in addition to the job you (presumably) already have?
That would be better than "earning" it like this!
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A
female
reader, ButterflyonFire +, writes (9 October 2006):
 No hun your not a slut. But, I think the sex for money thing needs to stop before you ruin your self image of yourself.
If he wants to help you out that's fine and if ya'll want to have sex, well that's fine too. But, explain to him that you care about him and you would rather earn your money some other way from him than sex.
If he cares about you for other than sexual reasons then he will understand. If he refuses than you don't need that. Because like I said your not a slut and you don't need to be selling yourself for money.
Best of luck. xoxo, Jamie
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (9 October 2006):
 It doesn't make you a slut it makes you a prostitute. A slut does it for free. Not sure what your money problems are but I'd be visiting the soup kitchen before I'd stoop down that low. Tell the guy to buzz off and start over fresh. Lesson learned.
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A
female
reader, carlyuk  +, writes (9 October 2006):
 omg wat a prick this guy doesn't respect you at all and if he liked u or loved u at all he wudn't be asking u for sex in exchange for money it doesn't make u a slut honey but it makes him pimp.!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2006): its wrong for ur friend to exchange payment in the form of sex. its called prostitution. and u need to tell him that. it doesnt make u a slut, its just the wrong way to pay back money. sounds like ur in to eachother, why not just date and u can have all the sex u want without feeling like ur prostituting. but darling, he should never have ever asked u to have sex for payment. u need to think about whether he respects u
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A
female
reader, snowbird  +, writes (9 October 2006):
 Tell him he can't afford you! - how much would once be worth - how much for 10 times?? how much for your peace of mind - and how much to keep it a secret from another man in the future, who values you as more than a quick 'knee-trembler' how would he feel?...and what if you enjoy it too, would that mean you owe HIM?!?
If you love him and he loves you, then why are you not sleeping together anyway...and when will the time come when he gets it for free ???
A true friend would help you out whatever, and not quantify you in this way. It cheapens all that has gone before!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2006): i think you are trying to convince yourself that you're not a slut. which i don't believe you are. i think you are just confused and despreate. this guy is taking advantage of you.He may care about you but he should not treat you like this. Vina's right you deserve so much better and quit wasting your love on him. there must be some other way to get money other than this. tell hi if he wants to help you out you will only borrow the money for a little while get rid of the sex or whaterver it is youre doing, it only sounds like hes using you and its not going to help you emotionally you doing damage to yourself
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A
female
reader, vina_101 +, writes (9 October 2006):
 Don't do it. Don't sleep with him for money. You are worth more than that. No amount of money should be worth you body. Any guy who suggests to you that you have to sleep with him for money does not deserve your time. I would suggest that you keep your distance from him. He obviously doesn't value you as a person otherwise he would not suggest for you to sleep with him. If you do sleep with him you'll only regret it. You are precious and special and you should not allow men use you for your body. You should respect yourself.There must be some other way to solve your money problems. Don't do something that you'll regret.
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