A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I am 14 years old and a 9th grader in High School. My first boyfriend just broke up with me and I'm crushed. One of the reasons he broke up with me is that his best friend doesn't like me. I know he hates me. He's been mean and has hated me years before I met my ex. I've sent him a message on face book asking him why he hates me and what can I do to make it right but he hasn't responded. I tried to ask him in school if he even got my message but when I said his name he yelled WHAT and cursed at me. I just walked away. I am still friends with my ex who told me to be nicer to him. I am nice to him. I just don't know what to do. I know that I can't be friends with everyone, I just don't want someone hating me for a reason that I don't know about. I want to make it right. I need help and advice on what to do or say to work things out with this guy. Yes, it's important to me. Please don't write silly or dirty advice - remember I'm only 14.
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best friend, broke up, crush, my ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYou are probably right. It's just going to be hard to be friends with my ex when his best friend doesn't want me around and is bad mouthing me for a reason that I don't know or understand. I really want to be friends with my ex.
Thanks again for your great advice.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 November 2010):
 If his friend is not willing to meet up with you then i think that the best thing you can do here is to accept that he doesnt want to talk to you and just avoid him, dont write to him anymore and just move on and accept that he will never be a friend to you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your advice. I already tried some of it before coming to this website. I did ask my ex to talk to his friend to find out why he hates me so much. My ex said he did and his friend wouldn't talk to him about it. He really knows how I feel and just keeps telling me to be nice.
He did give me a few more reasons why we broke up but none of them had to do with his best friend. I like the idea of my ex asking him to meet somewhere to talk (although I doubt he'll be willing to - I'm going to try anyway). I even left an anonymous sticky note on his friends locker just telling him to have an awesome day. He pulled it off his locker, crinkled it up and threw it away. I really don't know what else to do. It's frustrating.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (15 November 2010):
Hi you need to sit down with your ex and ask him why his best friend dislikes you so much, he might be able to tell you more, explain to him that you have never done anything wrong and you dont deserve to be treated like this. 14 year old boys are immature and they probably dont realise how much they can hurt someone, but try and get your ex to see how bad this is making you feel and hopefully he will get to the bottom of it.
He broke up with you because of his friend not liking you? Well that wasnt the mature thing to do was it, ask him in more detail about why he broke up with you and maybe you could even ask him if his friend would be willing to meet you somewere to talk to you. Goodluck.
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