A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm getting with this girl who's great,but she told me she likes "assholes".. I used to be one and I didn't even realize that girls like me because of it. I somehow became a nice guy.. an now I realize she likes me when I'm an asshole or tough - get it? I don't know - I need help.Anything would be great -thanks. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): No, the girls I've dealt with DID NOT just want a "confident" or "assertive" guy. They wanted an asshole. I know the difference because I'm still pretty damn confident and assertive even when I'm trying to be nice. A lot of girls won't settle until the guy has been an ASSHOLE to them at least once or twice.
Maybe you define "like" or "want" differntly than I do. I define "wanting" something as what actually makes them come around and stay around.
People also say they don't want smooth-talking politicians that lie to them. But that's the only kind of person they will actually vote for in large numbers. To me, that means they "want" to be smooth-talked and lied to.
A
female
reader, talker +, writes (5 July 2008):
 I can tell you that I agree...no girl EVER really likes assholes. They might say they like assholes, and I've said that numerous times, but the reality is that they don't. Although they might normally fall for that type of guy, what really attracts women is a guy who has confidence and isn't a big sissy about things. A man with a backbone who will not only be able to exhibit strength but that will also be sweet, kind, caring, and understanding without being a pushover.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): I've been there too. Girls like me best when I'm being an asshole. Start being nice to them and their attraction fades fast. Just try not to get too attached to her. At least don't always show it. Once a girl likes you, it takes a hell of a lot to make her actually stop wanting to be around you as long as you're decent SOME of the time. You really won't lose her if you get impatient and smartass about something.
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A
female
reader, softballplaya +, writes (4 July 2008):
 Hmmm this is quite a puzzling situation
Well most girls that you would ask their type would most often say the "bad boy" I think thats what she is trying to get at. I dont think she likes you to be an asshole to her, but stick up for her, fight for her, etc all the things a tough guy would do kinda. No girl likes a guy that acts like an asshole to them. Just be yourself, If you changed over a new leaf then stay that way. Dont act like someone your not to make someone else happy. I'm sure she will just as happy with you being yourself and nice rather than an asshole and meeting her standards ya know what I'm getting at? Anyways I hope I was of any insight on this
take care & good luck=]
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