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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Dear cupid, I have never really talked with anyone about this so I thought I would give this website a try, so please bare with me. I guess females would understand this situation the best. I think a lot of women have this sort of problem, but it is not something i have ever had to deal with before. So here it goesHere is my problem, how do I handle a certain girl who is mean to me? She's friends with only my male friends which includes my boyfriend actually. She is a bit of an attention seeker, flirty, sexual, has been with a ton of guys, etc.. The type of girl that a lot of girls would feel bothered by I guess you could say. Which I totally admit that I'm bothered by her. She has cheated on several of my friends who have dated her, sends naked pictures to everyone and so on. And I'm not trying to be so nasty about it, I just want you guys to understand a bit of what this person does. And she knows that I know this stuff about her. Would this be the reason she is the way she is with me?She for some reason has just decided that she doesn't like me and I'm honestly thinking it is because I'm a female so she has no interest in getting to know me maybe? I do know that she doesn't like me, she has told people and people have told me, so I no longer try to become friends with this girl because she is just not having it. I have never given her a reason not to get to know me. Have been around her, she stays away from me, have been in group conversations online with her and when I join, she will automatically leave. At this point I personally don't want to get to know her anymore, but since she is always around with my friends, it is not like I can really do anything about it. Why do you think she acts this way? How do I handle this person? Why do people like this kind of girl? I obviously want to be with my friends..but feel so uncomfortable around this girl and I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like the odd one out, and I am quite depressed over this. Thank you everyone, I will keep updated.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2013): Urgh... She's an attention seeker (to remain polite) that thrives on attention from guys... At this age, most guys make their decisions based on their hormones and I guess that this includes the hope of having sex with this girl.
I think that after a few years, guys tend to learn. maybe she will grow out of it or she will just continue to attract the wrong type of guys.
Another reason why she doesn't like you is because you are a threat. You seem to have your head on your shoulders and to be well liked/accepted by this group of guy pals and this based on your personality and not by flaunting your stuff around.
Ignoring the attention seeker is basically a good tool. When she strives for attention, just pretend not to care, or when you are in a group just focus on the others people and limit your interaction with her but without seeming bitchy. People probably already perceive her as a drama queen.
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (8 March 2013):
 So is this an online group of friends or a group of friends in real life, as in, the social interactions take place mostly in person?
Look, the group seems to be guys plus you. You are the outlier. She's figured out how to keep them focused on her and that includes your boyfriend. Are you certain you've found a good one?
Why does she act this way? She likes attention. It works. She has a group of guys who keep her entertained and busy.
How do you handle her? Pretending she doesn't exist might be a good strategy. If she is brought to your attention, then you can adopt one of my favorite expressions. In the south of the US, when someone is a loser, the women say "bless her heart." As in "Bless her heart, she's had a rough life and thinks baring her breasts will find her true love." "Bless her heart, she's had a rough life." It's basically a judgment delivered as pity.
Why do people like this kind of girl or do you mean to ask, why do people like her? She must bring them something they enjoy, or perhaps she's an expert blackmailer?
You want to be with your friends, again, is this a real life situation or an virtual one, that would help to know.
I feel there's another question from you here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/girls-how-do-you-deal-with-flirty-women.html
It's not up to you to deal with them. It's up to the men in your life to do that. If they don't/can't/refuse to do so, then your real gripe is with them, not the object of their flirty interactions.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2013): why would you want to be friends with her? when my friends are talking to someone I'm not friends with, I either leave or join in the conversation, but to casually talk to someone doesn't mean I have to get to know them, so when we are done talking I don't befriend them on facebook and only greet them if they say hello first.
"She for some reason has just decided that she doesn't like me and I'm honestly thinking it is because I'm a female so she has no interest in getting to know me maybe?
yes maybe, i've met a woman before who was a b... but only with other women... so go figure maybe this one is the same, and men want to be "friends' with her, because if she sends naked pictures to everyone she's probably labelled as easy , and they think they may get a chance, dunno, but seriously if she's mean to you ignore her .
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