A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Okay, I'm 13, almost 14, but I am VERY mature for my age. Well, there's this guy, whos name I refuse to mention, and he's freaking amazing. We have so much in common, and he likes me, well, from his behavor I can tell. So, here's my issue, he's 18, almost 19. I really, really like him. Also, I can not stress this enough, I am not ready for sexual relations of any kind and won't be ready for a while. People always say age is just a number, so is this so wrong?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2009): I'm the original writer..
We haven't had sex and aren't going to. He understands completly. He treats me with the same as he does around his friends, with the same respect and all.
I am not easily manipulated, I have had a rough life and have been basically taking care of myself. I know what can and could happen. I'm stupid in the least bit. My grandma lost her virginity at 13, my mom at 15, and I'm not about to make the same mistake that both my mom AND grandmother made. Thanks for the advice...
A
male
reader, The Gentle Man  +, writes (16 February 2009):
 Age is just a number but it only becomes a number when both people are on the same page.
You are a child, even if you are more mature you are still a child.
He is a young adult and on a different level. If he was 30 and you were 21 then thats just a number.
Im afraid that pursuing this will just end in tears and hurt feelings. That doesnt mean you cant both be friends.
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A
female
reader, cute_lily +, writes (16 February 2009):
heya, When I was 15 i started dating a 19 year old guy. A year and a bit later, we're still together and i'm still a virgin because i've spoken to him about his issue and he respects me. just make sure you talk to this guy about sex and stuff. Also make sure he doesn't treat you differently in front of his friends. Remember no matter how mature you are, you are still younger than him. About the whole age is just a number thing, you're 14 and he's 19. If your parents found out about that relationship they'd react differently to if you were 25 and he 30. I hope this helps. :)
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A
female
reader, BabygurlVa2090 +, writes (16 February 2009):
 I think you need to be careful and see if he really likes you for you and not trying take advantage of you, And if he really does like you but if you feel in your heart to date him go ahead but as far as the sex goes don't be in a rush to do it because once you do it you can't get it back.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): Age is not just a number when you are 13. You don't know who you are yet and someone might want to take advantage of you. So be careful dear!
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A
female
reader, mimisoph3 +, writes (16 February 2009):
 let me tell you a short story about me..i've been in ur situation i was 14 when the guy i was crushing on was almost 19 and about to graduate from high school,and i barely started freshman year....i was at a party and made out with him,lied about my age(told him i was 15) and he said he liked me and would like to see me again..the next day when he found out i was 14 he wasnt into me at all...i'm with you i think age is a number,the only thing that matters is that you find love with him...you should ask him if he really does like you or is just trying to score an underage girll...i think thats its not wrong..good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): It doesn't take any particular maturity for you to be attracted to an older guy. That's biology. Hormones. It's just being normal and 14 and horny. 18 yo guys are hotter than 14 yo guys, so you're attracted more to 18 yo guys. It's no different than comparing an ugly and poor guy versus a hot and rich guy. But when you're attracted to someone that you know is not a good healthy match for you, like a guy who is much too old, it demonstrates some serious maturity for you to decide not to pursue him.So do you still wanna prove that you're so "mature for your age" if it means staying out of this instead of moving forward with it?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2009): Well if you're more mature than every other 13 year old, and he's also more immature than other 18 year olds (might be) it could work! I have yet to meet a "mature" 13 year old, but I sure have met a lot of immature 19 year olds!Whatever happens, I really wouldn't recommend sex at that age.
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A
female
reader, 2dancinfeetxx +, writes (16 February 2009):
it's not wrong at all. you can't help who you like. when i was 14 i started dating a senior who was also 18. your guy may not be like the rest of them but trust me, an 18 yearold guy is not gonna want anything to do with a 13 yearold girl if theres no sex involved =/ i thought the completely opposite way when i was 14 but then i lost my virginity to him and he soon after dumped me.now that im 18 and have been having sex for 4 years i know that i or any of my friends couldnt have a relationship with someone 4 or 5 years younger than me who wasnt ready. my advice is just to talk to him and make sure he knows youre not ready. and dont feel pressured! i only did bc i thought it would make him love me and PLEASE dont make the same mistake! it really effed me up emotionally.. but as for the original question, age is just a number and theres nothing wrong with you being with an older guy, just make sure he knows youre not ready and make sure youre on the same page with your relationship. hope this helped, good luck!
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A
male
reader, Bryanz +, writes (16 February 2009):
Age isen't "just" a number. He is WAY to old for you, don't bother. That is VERY dangerous to date somebody 19 years old when your only 13. The chances of him liking you back aren't slim but are not likely either. Leave him be, and stay friends. You will constantly be called a slut, you will not have any friends. Don't bother with him, he is to old.
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A
female
reader, faithless +, writes (16 February 2009):
I think as long as you are mature enough to date, what the heck?! :) if you say no to sex then he should honor that
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