A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've noticed the same pattern repeating itself with me and guys. It's happened more times than I can count so I think there's something I must be doing to cause it, because not all men can be like this! They'll chase me, obsessively, for whatever length of time it takes me to start to feel something for them or feel like they are genuine. It can be weeks or years, doesn't matter. As soon as I reciprocate their interest, or show some enthusiasm about the future they talk about with me, they panic or lose interest in me. Why does this happen? Is it something I do or say? Or the kind of guy I attract? What can I do about it? There has been 1 guy who hasn't been like this, just 1, and he was abusive. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (4 August 2009):
 How fast is the turn around? You say they need to chase you for years? Perhaps it is the hunt that intrests them, but once you open up... well something is wrong and might it be that you talk about the future a bit to much?
If you have been chasing a girl for sometime and got nothing, then she suddenly turns around in a wedding dress. Well, that is pretty damn scary.
But you know what you do, what is different between when they are chasing and when you are standing still to be caught?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2009): It's more than likely something you do or say, but without spending a couple of days in your company it's difficult to say exactly what. It may be something as simple as they don't think your jokes are funny, endearing though that might be to some!
The only suggestion I can think of to find out is to do an 'exit poll', ie, get each guy to complete a questionnaire, written or verbal, about the reasons why it didn't work out and why they scarpered.
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