A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I went out with this guy for the first time on the weekend. He's cute,really nice and sweet, we have things in common and I think we had a good time. I felt very comfortable with him, coversation was good and it was really nice. I would like to see him again but there's one thing about him that weirds me out. He's 32 and lives in his parents' basement.The age itself isn't a big deal even though I'm much younger than him, it's that he's that old living in his parents' basement. He told me that he moved to this city from another city and his parents decided to move with him. I don't know if he's ever lived on his own but I assume he must have at one point at least when going to university. He said that he's living with his parents because he initially thought it was going to be temporary (now it's been 2-3 years and I don't know if it is or not) and they can't afford the house on their own. If he were to move out they'd have to find someone else to move in to pay for the house or else they'd have to move somewhere else so better him living there than someone else. I can understand the resoning and it's for a good cause but still, I find it weird and it freaks me out a little.I'm not sure if I should see him again because otherwise he's a really great guy but that one little thing is odd. Any advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI guess you guys are right, it does seem a little nitpicky. I just thought moving out is an important step in everyones lives and I've never met anyone that hadn't moved away from their parents. But you're right in that it isn't THAT big of a thing and there could be a lot of worse things in other people.
A
female
reader, malvern  +, writes (5 May 2008):
 I don't know why you are so worried about this. It clearly works out very well financially for his family to have him living at the house. I'm in my fifties and I had a partner who lived with his mother until he was 50 and she was in her seventies and had to go into a care home. He bought the house off her eventually. He wasn't 'odd', it's just that nothing had happened in his life where he had needed to move on. Your guy is a lot younger and probrably will move on eventually but right now he feels a great responsibility towards his family. That says a lot for him. Stick with him for a while and see how things go.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2008): Do you have any idea how much Rent costs these days?Not to mention just how much money you need for a Deposit on a house.Look, if he doesn't seem like a recluse save for the fact he lives at home and doesn't appear to use them for cheap housing, than let bygones be bygones and be happy.We all have our little niggling issues, and this is his.That said, if he moved they need only rent his room out, plenty of people do that these days.If it really bothers you, talk to him about it. Perhaps a solution can be worked out. Don't throw away a potentially good relationship over something so petty.Flynn 24
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