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female
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*ornUp
writes: I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now (we're both 20). For the past three months, we have spent literally 24/7 together. We have all classes together, are together even when not in class, sleep together every night, I don't even SHOWER alone anymore! Recently, I started feeling like I am no longer in love. I question my love for him constantly. There have been two or three moments in the past 2 weeks that I HAVE felt "that loving feeling" however. He is the only one I ever hang around with or talk to, never see my friends anymore, but that never bothered me until now. Yet he is my best friend, I am more comfortable around him than anyone else, and thinking about being without him scares me to death. I almost broke up with him last night, but his tears and seeing him in such agony made my heart break into pieces. When he put on his coat to leave, I almost died. I could NOT let him walk out. I'm never upset to see him, I never feel disgusted by him, but I'm not excited when he is around anymore. He is SO sure that we can work this out...but I'm a pessimist and of course worry that we cannot. But I am more than willing to work at it. He's an amazing guy, always there for me, never abusive or mean, there is nothing wrong with him, other than I am a little bored. I know (and I have been told by my family) that guys like him are VERY rare. Does anybody have any advice for me? Please...this is a relationship worth saving.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2006): I cant believe it reading your txt was like read a page out of my diary. I have the exact predicament as u. would luv to know how you got on and how u delt with things i so love my bf with all my heart and people always tell me how lucky i am and yes i am very lucky to have him. Like ur bf he treats me really well. Before i met him i had just come out of an abusive relationship and it took me a while to trust men again but he won me around and i ended up telling him things i would never tell anyone. I just find that we do spend 24/7 together and that spark seems to have left me and im so despretly trying to find it again. Would be great to get some advice or to know how u got on. Please help me save my relationship.
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2006): Hi there,believe it or not i was in the exact same situation as you are now 1 month ago, just that i was the guy.
I have learnt from this break up of mine that being with your partner 24/7 after a while will sometimes make you think about other things in life that you could do instead of spending time with him/her. Yes, sometimes you would feel bored because every moment you spend is with him/her and because of this over time you start to lose your feelings for each other and sometimes even resent each other.
Your at least willing to work things out with your partner, i am not so lucky as my partner broke it off with me...
The guy you are with sounds very nice and genuine, i would advise you to try and go out with yourfriends more often or go find hobbies and other things to do often so you wont feel as bored and then you can try work things out with your parnter...
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2006): He sounds like a fantastic person.
I would not reccomend you splitting up however maybe a short break from eacher other will make you excited to see him agaain? Also in future maybe you can limit the amount of time you spend with each other so when you are together its more special.
xx
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (28 November 2006):
Well the good news is you've figured out what the problem is. You're bored. No matter who you end up with, life at times, IS BORING. If you meet another guy, you will still have your challenges. Things become routine and mundane. Perhaps you're not sure what you wnat for the future. Maybe it doesn'tfeel quite right. Sometimes we make big decisions based on a "mood". Be careful, sometimes you can't get things back once you've let them go.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): I totally agree with Bellachic below. You two should find hobbies and interests outside of having to spend time together all the time. Also going out with your own friends, doing your own thing is also very healthy. Being in each other's faces all the time can cause a sort of 'resentment' - too harsh a word, but I think you'll know what I mean.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): I think you can save your relationship, just give yourself some space, go and see your friends or go shopping without him, just to give yourself some "alone" time. If you spend less time with him, you will look forward to seeing him more, and it will be more special when you do see him. You definitely need your friends. If he doesn't understand, then explain to him that you need other people to have a healthy balanced life. Maybe talk to some other people in your classes, and allow him to talk to his friends in classes aswell. And when your not in classes - go out with your friends. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, bellachic385 +, writes (28 November 2006):
 Well you love him a lot otherwise you wouldn't spend every waking momment and not with him. But you are now feeling the effects of that. You do need to have and spend time with other friends besides your lover. You should stay with him, styart spending time with other people. Go shopping with your girls and relax. You need to have time away from him, not because he is bad but to much of a good thing is working agaist you this time. Good Luck.
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female
reader, charlotte123 +, writes (28 November 2006):
 Dear tornup,I think you should try not seeing each other for a day then when you do see eachother it's a feeling like the first time you loved someone take it from personal experience this really work and your familys right it is really hard to find a nice genuine guy.Good Luck.charlotte
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