A
male
age
22-25,
Forge
writes:Hello readers, this is something I think should have a female counterpart, so if you would be kind enough to write one, I'll be happy to give it a view!Well hello friends! This is my second article here, and I'm excited to write it, because it's my specialty: Teenage guys.Considering I am one, I have some experience here! This will help for those girls who want more information as to why their friend would rather play video games instead of hang out in person. Boys brains are still a work in progress. They like being competitive with their guy friends, hence they love playing online games. Though not all the time.Sometimes guys do get very anxious about approaching girls but over time guys do start to get the courage to approach girls. Some guys get it right from day one. Some guys have to learn through trial and error. Girls please try to recognise how much courage it takes to ask a girl out. Guys agonise about such tasks.Guys also lie to their male friends. It is bravado. They want to appear more confident than they sometimes feel.So, let's say there's a guy that you see taking small peeks down your shirt, ladies. He's such a sicko, look at him, what a perve, right? Yes he is, because sexual harassment is never ok.Girls: such guys have not yet realised that such behaviour is unacceptable on so many levels. Guys are curious. Their hormones are in disarray and as explained above their brains are still being rewired. This might explain why so many guys like to look at pictures of girls.Many guys will try to discreetly admire you and will get better at being more discreet as they become more experienced with girls. If the guy is behaving especially poorly then you will recognize that he is a guy to avoid until he learns to better control his hormones. It is not behaviour to be proud of to be forever trying to sneak a look.But try telling that to some guys who don’t understand that girls have feelings too and girls don’t like to embarrassed by pervy guys.If a guy behaves in an unacceptable manner then use an assertive voice and let him know that you want him to stop behaving in a creepy way. If he dares to claim it was “just a joke” call his bluff and tell him, “no it’s not a joke and stop doing that.”If he tries to tell you to be proud that he was admiring you then remind him that sexual harassment Is never anything but an insult and ask him to stop. Do NOT hit him and do NOT say something deliberately insulting or humiliating.“Oh, did you hear? Dan is such a player! He dated six girls this week!”Okay, step back.Back some years ago when the world was still in black and white, I’ve heard that it wasn’t uncommon to go on a date with multiple women in the one week.Not a good idea and very exhausting for the guy. And not smart.Girls like to be regarded as special. If a guy is seeing a different girl every day for seven days in a row then he does not properly learn to appreciate any one girl.Such guys are not really interested in forming a respectful relationship with a girl. Instead they are just collecting notches on their belt and that is more about his ego than whether or not he likes any of the girls he spends time with. Such guys are future players and what girl would ever want to waste her time on a player? He has nothing to offer a sincere girl who wants a committed respectful relationship.One sincere relationship with one girl is a much better way to learn more about a girl. If you don’t want to date exclusively then choose to mix with a group of guy and gal friends and go out to functions as a group, without pairing off with any particular girl yet.That way you still get to meet people and learn more about the people you are particularly interested in seeing.Once you do find a girl where you feel mutually good about each other, then your friends will, at first, think it is ok to subject you to some ragging. Mostly the friends are just a little bit jealous of you.Once you have started dating then you had better be very sure that you want to start seeing that one special girl, Why? Because after a time some girls may start to become more proprietorial about her hold over you.. Nip this in the bud early. Start as you mean to go on.If you are just friends with some girls and friends only then be upfront with your special girl.Let her know how much she means to you. Tell her that you do have a few friends who you like meeting and talking things over with.Let her know that these are platonic friends only.That she is your special friend and the rest are girls you talk to and sometimes advise from time to time.It is up to the guy to make sure that things remain as you have explained to your Gf.Explain that “hanging out” with some girls is just that, “hanging out”:A guy who “hangs out” with other girls regularly even if he has a girlfriend may just be a very likeable guy who everyone is drawn to.Try not to judge.Guys like to think they have some autonomy. If you try to corral him too hard he may grow resentful and wonder if you trust him.Trust is huge in a relationship.Respect and treasure it.Gossip is destructive in a relationship.A couple needs to act as one. Gossip will undermine your relationship if you listen to it. Learn to stay calm if anyone foists some gossip in front of you.Gossip is the problem of the person saying the gossip and that’s where it should stay – with the gossip as their problem.Try not to then make their gossip your problem.Talk out any problems with your main Gf. Encourage her to bring her concerns to you and you will do the same , Try not to share all you private issues with the whole group and encourage her to do the same. Some issues are best handled between the two people in a close relationship,Some girls are late to date. Maybe it is what their parents want. Don’t pressure them. They will choose to date eventually. Just be very courteous . Remain pleasant and wish them well. They will remember your courtesy years later."All men are such jerks!" Says most girls I know, or a few on here recently.NO, don't think like that!That is not true, and I'm living breathing proof of that! It depends on how he was raised, or his actions.Just because your first boyfriend is a jerk, doesn't mean that the others are too. Several people call me a gentleman, and I know a few other guys I'd say the same for! Many guys are just scum, but more often then not, they aren't that bad.You just need to get to know them.Although, if he is a real punk, go ahead and leave him. Don't be friends with him, don't talk to him. But make sure you got the facts straight before assuming every guy is dumb and a waste of your time.Trust me.Some guys are consumed with low confidence in themselves and only relax once they know a person well. That’s when you will discover what a fun guy he really is.So, let's so there's a cute guy you want to date, but he won't ask you out.What do you do?You ask him. It may seem a little forward but the guy will generally like it. Girls do discreetly ask guys out all the time. Don’t be too pushy as that might freak him out. Do try to speak to him quietly when he is not surrounded by his friends and when you two are alone. It’s an opportunity so take a chance.If he says no, then you don't freak out.Not the end of the world. There's plenty more fish. I know you're thinking "I don't want OTHER fish, I want THAT fish!"Well, you can either try again in a few weeks, or just don't try again at all, and deal with rejection. Just don't make a huge deal out of it.I recently was rejected by who was (what I thought) my dream girl. I am still a bit down, but I'm not letting everyone know I feel bad. It happens. You muscle through it, and start another time. Also, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. True story. Do what you will with that little bit of info :)Why is he playing video games, even though you offered to go somewhere with him? It's either because he:A) doesn't think it's fun enough.B) might be busy soon, and is just using up time.C) he's a lazy idiot.I'm a bit of everything. I'm a guy, that's why. If he invites you over for a game, accept it, if the timing is convenient for you.Videogames not your thing? It gives you the opportunity to hang out, and get to know him better. Believe me, guys talk a lot while playing games. He will also enjoy showing you how good he is at playing the games. That will boost his confidence if he’s able to show you how skilled he is at the game.If he's ignoring you the whole time, then he is wasting your time and he is not the guy for you. His loss.How to text a guy: (refer to this video) "How to text a guy" By swoozie(Sorry for no link, I'm on mobile :( ) it explains everything a girl needs to know about texting a guy.Well, that's my time for the night, I'll see you all in my next question or article."Look ahead to the future, as the past may lead you in a circle."
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confidence, has a girlfriend, jealous, muscle, online game, online gaming, player, text, video games Reply to this Article
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You can add your comments or thoughts to this article A
male
reader, Forge +, writes (12 September 2014):
Forge is verified as being by the original poster of the question That means a lot, especially from you, Mark. Thank you. I will be writing more in the future, so keep your eyes open. Maybe this weekend.
A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (12 September 2014):
 A great article and very insightful. Actually it could have been written by my teenage self which is quite strange.
The thing is that most of what is written in the article made me chuckle as it is, with the greatest of respect, quite naïve an innocent (written by a teen after all) and yet when I was that age that's how it all seemed. As one gets older and more experienced it all seems very different.
An enjoyable trip down my own memory lane. I hope you write more.
Mark
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A
female
reader, TheAdvisor +, writes (11 September 2014):
This is a really good article, so keep up the good work, and write more!!!
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A
female
reader, ShakeWutUrMamaGaveYou +, writes (7 September 2014):
Hi,
Thanks very much. I'll take your word for it. I'm planning to maybe do it sometime this week, and I'll let you know how I get on.
Thanks! xxx!
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A
male
reader, Forge +, writes (7 September 2014):
Forge is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFace to face always, ALWAYS, is the best option. Anything else and he will probably say no. But do it alone, when none of his friends (guy or girl) are around. This could be hard to get an opportunity, but it works. I recently blew it with a girl because we weren't alone.
Best of luck!
Førg€
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A
female
reader, ShakeWutUrMamaGaveYou +, writes (7 September 2014):
Hi Forge,
great article!!!
I just wanted to ask your opinion.
You know in your article, you said that guys like being asked out? How do they like it? Should the girl ask face to face? Or a note?
I'm only asking because I'm considering asking that guy I like out. Only, I'm not sure how. I can't text or call him because I haven't got his number. I haven't got the guts to ask for it, and I'm not allowed a phone.
So can you please help me?
Thanks xxx!
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