A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I had just finished sex. The phone rang, and I answered it. My husband said it ruined the moment, and I should have let the answering machine pick it up and was really hurt.More info:*I didn't have to get up to answer the phone. It's on the headboard within easy reach. I just extended my arm.*We were still coupled when I reached for the phone.*The answering machine is in another room, and we wouldn't have heard who it was.*Turns out it was a wrong number.So was it ridiculous for me to want to answer the phone? Or for him to be hurt? It's not like I answered it DURING sex (I wouldn't). Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Cherriepie +, writes (6 February 2008):
 I have to weigh in on this, girl. What you did is called a mood breaker....and with some guys its a big thing. thing is its easy for us to switch it on and off, but with a guy you have to get him in a sexy mood without distractions to get get his attention...and especially to get him a stiffy. I always put my cell phone on silent and have the home phone off the hook if I know I'm going to be busy having sex. Even if is just a little making out I'd ignore it...what call can be more important than a romantic kiss? Whatever it is can wait and they can leave a message.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionGuess I owe him an apology. Thanks for putting everything into perspective; I appreciate it.
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A
male
reader, childof1981 +, writes (28 September 2007):
 Personally I would feel like crap if a partner did that to me.
The question in his mind right now is . . did she switch from intimate sexual experience to talk on the phone mode in an instant? or was she never in that state to begin with?
So yeah, your husband is likely feeling very insecure now and wondering if you have sex with him because you enjoy it and love him or just to placate him? If it's the latter it hurts double because he feels like he is letting you down and not fulfilling a spousal obligation and also that you don't trust him enough to tell him so.
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A
female
reader, brooke5426  +, writes (27 September 2007):
 i think it depends on what you mean by "just" finished sex. i can see why he was hurt. its important and intimate and he didnt want the moment to be interrupted by someone else - he just wanted it to be special for a while longer.brookex
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007): YEP that was a mistake. Think about it like this..... Making love is the deepest expresion of two peoples feelings for one another. The act itself being over dosen't mean that the emotional connection wasn't still hapening at least for him. When u picked up the phone you severed that emotional connection and that's why he's hurt. Quite honestly I'm suprised it's not the other way arround in this situation where the guy asnwered the phone and the girl got upset. Regardless be happy that your husband loves you enough to be upset. Also if he didn't care he wouldn't be upset right!!!!!!
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (27 September 2007):
 I can understand what he meant. Even though your were finished the psyical part of sex maybe he felt that cuddling or talk aftterwards is just as important as the actual sex and he thinks its rude to aswer the phone.
Next time dont answer it or unplug the phone until you both part ways.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007): I guess its a little hurtful for your partner after you have just had sex to miss out on his pat on the back to a phone call, ha.ha. I think perhaps he did over react a little.
You could have let the answer machine get it, unless you were on call for an emergency? Let it ring next time. Keeps the peace!
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A
female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (27 September 2007):
 I would've just let the machine pick it up but then again, I don't get that many calls and I have to be in the mood to talk to people anyhow, so my machine picks up most of my calls then I decide when to call and chat with people so I'm not rushed or at a 'bad time'.
Why do you think you were compelled to grab the phone at that moment? Out of habit? Out of curiosity? Or maybe you have kids or elderly parents and everytime the phone rings, you worry that it could be one of them needing something, or worse yet, an emergency?....At any rate, I'd say your husband is feeling like he's always 2nd on the list, so maybe next time, let the machine pick it up so he feels like #1 a little longer. We all have alot of demands on our time, so when you're in a position like this, enjoy it. Don't let the outside world steal your intimacy so quickly. I hope that helps you out.
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