A
male
age
36-40,
*rOveranalysing
writes:So I really have feelings for my colleague, I hardly know him but I'm so attracted to him; he's good looking, intelligent, we potentially have loads in common, and I have no doubt he is aware that we could be great friends if nothing more. He only recently re-joined our company, and had previously worked for the company a long time ago (before my time), he had previously done the job I was employed to do now. Something had happened in the interim period for the boss not to put him down for the same job (which I suspect he wants and longs for, he seems to feel the boss didn't have faith in him for whatever reason). He's vain, not as kind as he could be, but also there's tonnes of potential there if he worked on his ego to be a wonderful person, and I'm just very sexually attracted to him. Here's the thing, he's friendly but not overly so, to the point I think sometimes he is jealous or threatened by me, so much so that I noticed he had mentioned in an email he left open that I had been drafted in as a "new version of him". I only want us to become friends because its so rare to meet someone who has such a similar background, but I feel its such hard work. If he got over his frustration at the situation, he'd find a great ally in me or even a potential partner if he finds me attractive. I cant tell if he resents me or is attracted to me, or both, there's certainly a tension there, I don't know what to do? Should I steer clear of someone who perhaps has mean tendencies? Or make an effort and put myself in vulnerable position? all advise gratefully received...
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female
reader, Mummy2be1234 +, writes (29 September 2010):
I would say to him that you feel like theres tension between yous and that if you have done anything to affend him you apologise. see what he says back. if hes nice enough hel say you havent and then you could go from there, maybe ask him to go for a drink after work to get to know each other :)
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