A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 20 year old United States Marine Corps, I've been in for 1 year and 7 months, I'm an infantryman and I'm shipping out to Afghanistan soon. I have never had a girlfriend, or even kissed a girl. All the other marines I know have all had girlfriends or even have wives already, and I always lie if they ever ask me about things like this, because I am embarrassed. I don't think it's looks I'm in great shape and I look a lot like my family, and none of my siblings have this problem at all. I just don't know how women want me to act, I know they say act like yourself, but if I was to do that, I would just be quiet all the time, because that's just my nature. Please help, I'm afraid I might not come back, and will have never loved a girl.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): woah Tron.. it is not extrememly rare that they die.. my husband has been in Afgh. for only two months so far and over ten people have died..
Sorry if that scares you but honestly, when you're fighting in a war, ignorance is not bliss.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2009): United Nations more dangerous than the marines? That's completely false, you won't be in any danger as a united nations peace keeper, to even compare that with our soldiers fighting against the terrorists in aphganistan is offensive.
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A
male
reader, tron +, writes (27 June 2009):
I will probably be joining the United Nations Ranger division in Africa soon (in a few more months) to suppress civil wars, and it just as if not more dangerous then fighting in Afghanistan. I have never had a girlfriend either or kissed a girl, but don't worry man its extremely rare that a Marine or any military personnel die, unless they are in extensively hostile area. You will come back.
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A
female
reader, mrs.shiver +, writes (23 February 2009):
You seem nice and sweet. Hang in there. I'm sure there are a lot of girls out there who would want to be with a young and quiet guy like you, and you're going to meet them sooner or later. And you're a Marine. What girl doesn't like a Marine? You're already well loved by many women just by being one, including me. :) It's not always about what you were already able to do with a girl. What most people fail to realize is that it's really about how ready you are for a commitment and how sincere you are about the stuff you're going to to do in a relationship.
And don't worry, you'll come home. Marines are always in my prayers. Semper Fi!
-a proud marine fiancee
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2009): I guess I shouldn't be surprised another Marine has this problem, there are like 200,000 of us, not that it makes me feel any better or nothin, it still blows to have never had a girlfriend, getting drunk never worked for me either. Are you gonna be humpin around the manpack radio out in the field or is that some other mos in comm?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): You aren't the only marine with that problem. Not infantry (2621) but I'll be going to Afghanistan soon as well. Was put on a SST and chances are high I'll be attached to infantry anyway.I see an attractive girl and want to talk to her but I usually don't because I don't know how to go about it. Get a few beers in my system and I can have a conversation with a chick all night (sober chick, of course), but I never like get a number or anything because when drunk I'm an idiot. Drunk I can think of easy ways to approach a chick and talk to her, sober it is extremely awkward because I think about what I'm saying too much, but I want to be sober so I won't just walk away from a girl after I get her all interested in me. I want someone to just force me to go and spark a conversation with a girl I find attractive but since I keep this a secret, that won't happen.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): I knew what you were feeling and going through. It is not easy, listening and seeing people, enjoy a quality of life, you yourself had never enjoyed. I went through life wondering what it was like, to be part of something so special, that I went through great lengths to acquire it. I wanted what other people had. But, as I was working one day, I met a new employee. I had things to show her and teach her about the place. Which ignited a conversation between us. Now, I had the same personality that you described-quiet,shy,and unsure of himself. But, it was in this one person that I figured out, that I was more capable than I thought was, when it came to expressing myself. Later which, benefited me to finding my first love- my first girlfriend.
You may not fine love, or have IT find you. What I'm telling you, is that, its out there and you must not give up.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2009): Wow thanks for the all the advice, I didn't expect so many replies.
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A
female
reader, aunty_rach  +, writes (16 January 2009):
hey give me your number!
i'm sure any lucky lady would love to be with someone like you. sometimes things happen for a reason, maybe she will be waiting for you when you come back from your tour. you will make it back and the right girl will be waiting for you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2009): hi there marine
Don’t worry I am sure Mr. Obama will make sure all you boys get home safe and sound, and don’t worry about the girl either, people don’t get that love shouldn’t be rushed, you go out looking for it and its nowhere to be found, you sit around coz you so tired of looking then it just pops up, who knows where you will meet that special girl you could meet her anywhere or at anytime, and once you meet that girl you wont be quite and not say Hi ,coz your heart will tell you that this is the right girl, you might not become the most confident guy on the block but in that moment you will get the self-confidence inside of you.
Phil Collins You Can't Hurry Love
I need love, love
to ease my mind
And I need to find time
someone to call mine;
My mama said
You can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
But it's a game of give and take
You can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
Just trust in a good time
No matter how long it takes
How many heartaches must I stand
Before I find the love to
let me live again
Right now the only thing that
keeps me hanging on
when I feel my strength,
ooh, it's almost gone
I remember mama said
You can't hurry love
No you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
It's a game of give and take
How long must I wait
How much more must I take
Before loneliness
[ Find more Lyrics at www.mp3lyrics.org/byV ]
Will cause my heart, heart to break?
No, I cant bear to live my life alone
I grow impatient for a
love to call my own
But when I feel that I, I can't go on
Well these precious words
keep me hanging on
I remember mama said
You can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
Well, it's a game of give and take
You can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
Just trust in a good time
No matter how long it takes, now break!
Now love, love don't come easy
But I keep on waiting
Anticipating for that soft voice
To talk to me at night
For some tender arms
hold me tight
I keep waiting
Ooh, till that day
But it ain't easy (Love
don't come easy)
No, you know it ain't easy
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A
female
reader, lovesick2 +, writes (16 January 2009):
Some of us like the quiet ones.In fact I like the quiet ones the best. It may take a little time,because you may have to wait for a special girl that notices you are quiet and she will make the first move.I know this could be hard to meet someone if you are to quiet but it will happen,you are still young.When you come back from Iraq you will meet a special woman and love her.In return she will love you, support you and desire you.
Take care and Thank you for being a marine you are already loved by many.
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (16 January 2009):
You're not alone. I think pretty much everyone feels like you do at one stage in there life- like they are the only person who hasnt kissed someone, had a gf/bf or had sex.
I bet you there are other guys you work with who are in the same boat- its just they hide it just like you do because they are also embarrased.
Not too long ago, I was in your shoes, so I truly do understand, but trust me, once it happens, you think 'hmm why did I worry so much?'.
I think the best advice is to just be yourself- and I know you said you think that wouldnt work because you are quiet by nature- well I dont see anything wrong with being quiet by nature. I myself am quiet too. Not everyone wants to be with some loud outgoing person who doesnt stop talking for just one minute. In fact, most loud people prefer to be with a quiet person, because another loud person would steal the lime light away from them, lol.
The only problem could be is that you are so quiet to the extent that other girls dont think you are interested. So you have to be careful about that- im not saying change the nature of who you are, but try to make sure that if you do like a girl, give off some more signals, as often people who are quiet can give off the wrong signals to people (ive done that far too many times!).
Hope this has helped :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2009): You know, if you are quiet, why not try going to places where people typically have to be quiet? The library, for one.
College girls need books too, you know. ;) I know I am always at the library because of some lame professor.
If you don't like this idea, perhaps try opening up a bit more. If you feel that you cannot because you feel insecure or what not, try counseling. It can be very helpful and boost one's confidence.
I hope that you find yourself a girl who is deserving of you. Good luck!
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