A
male
age
30-35,
*ernando Garcia
writes:Okay so I've been with my girlfriend for almost tow years. We both lost our everything to eachother. She is the type of girl that never lied to me, she never tried to hurt me. In any way possible did she ever disappoint me at all. So where is the problem you may ask? Well the problem was me, I'm insecure, jealousy problems and I don't got trust. The first time I hurt my girlfriend was in our 3 months I broke up with her because thought she was cheating on me(at this point I still didn't know how she really was) so we broke up and her mom explain to me everything so it turned out I was wrong. So valentines day we broke up for the first time. I made her cry all day and I basically went out to the movies. Seccond time that I hurt her was in our 4 monts. She was feeling sick and she had tould me about it. But at that time I was with my friend. And my friend toke my phone and started to text my girlfriend. Next thing I know my friends starts telling me your girlfriends is being a bitch i do t know how your with her. At this point I toke my phone from friend and started talking to my girlfriend again. And she was being completely diffrent with me. So we started to argue and it got to the loin that I was so mad, that I send her a picture of my kissing another girl. Well when my girlfriend saw it she tould her mom and she go even worst that she went to the dr.s that day. Her mom talked to my mom and it was a big deal her mom tould my mom that she didn't want me with her daughter no more (my girlfriend) for good. Well turned out we went a week with it talking and at school I got into a fight. And my girlfriend(my exx at that time) and she called me and she wanted to see me. To see if I was okay. Well I went to see her and we got back together. And we went too 1 year with out problems well atleast she though. Between that year she went to Mexico an me not trusting her I thought she would cheat on me while she over their. Well I got so I insecure that I went out to a club and I cheated on her with some girl. She didn't find out till months later. But before she found out. One day like 4 months ago we got into the stupidest fight ever. She dumped me. I was angry because she dumped me that the next day I went to a school dance and got my self a another girlfriend. But who was the girl I got with? The same girl I met at the club months before the school dance. So turns out my girlfriend found out about her and she tould me to erase her number and never bugg her again. So I was with a new girlfriend. But it all ended in a week or so. So I went single for two months and I started missin my old girlfriend. So we got back together for the thrid time. NOW THE STORY THAT HAPPEND 2DAYS AGO. I was at school and I got a messages saying your girlfriend is talking to some guy behind your back. So I texted my girlfriend asap. She tould that she didn't talkto this guy at all. And I didn't believe her. So I got the guys number and texted him asking the same question" are you talking to my girl." He said he was but that she had tould him she was single. So what i did I got my girlfriend I toke he so we can meet up with the guy she was talking to. But we we meet neither my girlfriend of the guys had any prove of nothing they were blaming eachother and saying that it was lies. So I got shocked and down on my self so I tould my girlfriend let's go home. So were walkin and her mom drove to pick us up and she cursed me out sayin she don't want me being with her dauther no more. And my girlfriend when we go to her house she tould me if I was going to be with her then we have to built trust. So the next day I asked her are we still together and she don't want to tell me yes or no. And I'm writing this while she is at a club. And I'm here at home thinking of a way to fix this situation. When im the one who coused all of this. Because she has never hurt me or lie to me. And I need her but she don't trust me no more. And I want to prove to her that ima change for her. But she doesnt want to give me a chance what should I do to fix this situation:(??
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2011): For the time being, you just have to be friends with her. Its one of the best ways to build trust between each other. Let her know that you're available if she ever wants to talk or hang out. But don't force it on her or beg her because it will just annoy her. This will also give you both time to figure out what you both want and maybe it won't be each other. She's put up with a lot and I'm sure she doesn't want to again so just commit to getting better about trust and make some new friends and find some new hobbies.
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