A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi please give me some advice. Iv been living with my boyfriend who has always been the jealous and paranoid type for about 3 years. We've worked through alot of issues together and through out it all Iv stood by him and been the best girlfriend possible. Iv even had people laughing at me due to not going to the office meal, not making friends at work etc just because Iv tried to ease his worries. He's been unemployed (through no fault of his own, he's been trying desperately) for about a year now and Iv worked like 60 hour weeks to pay for things whxh we otherwise could not have had, e.g a visit to his family. So a few months ago a female co worker added ne on Facebook, I usually dont accept co workers, especially males but she is one person who actually doesn't seem to mind my lack if socializing outside work. A couple of days later her bf added me (who also works with us). I accepted him since I'd accepted his girlfriend and didn't want to seem like I was accusing him of having an ulterior motive. Last night my bf noticed him on my friends list and has decided I dont deserve him and a week to leave our home. Iv tried telling him Iv done nothing wrong only to be told I think I haven't, bur I have. He knows this guy is my co workers boyfriend yet he's also seen my talking to him at work and this confirms his suspicions not only is he being stupidly paranoid but also evidently been watching me at work.So the man Iv given everything for doesn't want to be with me, I'm financially in trouble and effectively homeless. Iv lived and breathed this guy I'm having trouble seeing how I can get over him. And truth is, I love him with all my heart. Please help
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female
reader, relentlessheart  +, writes (15 January 2011):
You really need to tell him, you need to have a sit down. If the lease is in both your names you have at least 30 days depending on your state laws, before you have to move out, whether or not you're on the lease. You've been paying the bills and more than likely have the bank statements and a job to back it up. He doesn't trust you. I have trust issues with my man and it's killing our relationships. My fiance finally explained it to me that I can't keep bringing my past relationships, of being cheated on, and think he's the same. I can't blame him for what others did to me. Seems like he freaked out like I did, but way more extreme- and kicking you to the curb without even paying attention to the fact that you're all on fb together is easier said than done. Tell him without trust you don't have a relationship. If he doesn't start making any improvements with trying to just take your word for granted, then he's just way over jealous. Only you can decide how much you love him and trying to prove yourself to him isn't any fun- I feel horrible for putting my fiance through it. Best of luck to you.
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