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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I'm so sad tonight. I have been dating this guy for 4 mths. we have met families. talk everyday. He actss like a boyfriend. Things didnt add up so I surprised him tonight by showing up at his house because this morning he texted saying he would call and never did. He came to the door and closed the door behind him. Told me he had company and it was his aunt but didnt invite me in. then said he would call me later. I know this is bullshit. And it hurts terribly. How do you think he feels. I let it known that I didnt believe him. He got caught. What should I do if he tries to contact me? Do men have any remorse for hurting us?? And I thought he was a nice man. Thanks for the advice. My heart is broken.
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male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (28 July 2009):
 Yes you may know its true(most likely is) but with him being surprised by you, it is apparent that indeed its the case. I mean after you met the family, wouldn't he want to show you off to his aunt?
So if you don't want to deal with him anymore, then don't. That means NO CONTACT AT ALL!
Im sorry it happened to to you, it's happened to me as well.
The No contact thing is huge, and I will tell you right now that unless you have a constitution of an iron woman, the No Contact thing will take more than one try.
You may feel you want closure, or even to think its not happening, but your gut knows...the gut never lies.
So if you do not go through with the No Contact on the first try, its ok. It takes many of us many tries before we get it through our head that cheaters are flawed and incapable of caring for anyone but themselves.
If you do have contact with him and ask for him to explain himself, be prepared to get that it is either your fault(yes that one is played, but every cheater starts out using it and beating it like a dead horse) OR you will get what is called "trickle down truth", in that you will get bits and pieces of the truth, but never anything truly close to what it actually is. Plus when that happens you begin to get obsessed with every detail of the illicit affair, and then it just destroys you even further.
Take it from me, just walk away from this asshole and don't look back.
Best of Luck
A
female
reader, kayla20  +, writes (28 July 2009):
 atleast its 4 months rather than 4 years and now you no what a cheat he is and u dont deserve this.if he tries to call u should ignore it completely until he gets the message dont fall for his rubbish he was disrespectful of ur feelings.find urself someone that will treat u so much better they r out there
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