A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been living together for almost 2 years. The longer we've been together the shorter our bedroom life seems to get. When we first met we would go at it for 1-2 hours and it was amazing! But as time has gone on I've noticed that it's been getting shorter (which isn't a problem) and before it would be amazing, now it's just boring. He seems to always finish and then just stop when I haven't gotten anything. He always tells me that he wants me to be completely honest with him, especially when it comes to sex, so I've told him before about me not 'finishing the race' and the first time he cried, the second time I brought it up to him he started an argument about how all I do is take and take and how I need to give some in order to get some. Most of our sex involves me pleasuring him in multiple ways while he just lays there. Can anyone give me some advice on how to either make him more excited about giving me some 'fun' or how to bring it up to him without him getting offended or hurt? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (22 January 2011):
 Sounds like your boyfriend has become a lazy lover. In any rock-solid relationship, a man should take pride in making sure his woman is satisfied. That's just part of good, compatible love making.
It also appears you've taken steps to inform him he isn't really doing his job. While he hears you, he really isn't listening (or you didn't hear his excuses).
I think you need to ask yourself if this is the type of man who is going to listen to your needs down the road. If you have an issue around the house, or something, can you count on him to take care of it and listen? Does he have a tendency to dodge issues with you on other non-sexual things. Just a heads up.
But in order to answer your question, I think instead of pleasuring him first, you need to make sure you get pleased first. Have him give you a massage or stimulate you orally or manually. That way you'll be more likely to have an orgasm. Dress up in sexy outfit and have him "ravish" you.
You may also want to, as a couple, read some love-making guides. There are some great books out there that you can explore that will help break up your "routine".
Hope things work out.
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