A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:look i got married at 17 ive been with my husband for a year married now.. but it seems the longer im with him the more unhappy i get.. its like i dont wana be with hime i want to move on.. what should i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2009): Ask yourself why you got married at such a young age. Did you get married for all the right reasons? These might include being deeply, madly, passionately, head over heels in love with each other, having quite a few shared interests, sharing the same sense of humour and the same goals for your futures.
Being in lust with each other and having fantastic sex sessions are not good enough reasons for getting married. When the novelty wears off you aren't left with much to keep you together. The feeling of resentment at being tied down to one person when you haven't had a chance to play the field is destructive. At your age you havent had the time to do that, or to spread your wings and fly, and no doubt that resentment is starting to build up. Perhaps you feel trapped, and while all your friends are out having a great time you're stuck at home tending to the laundry etc.
You have to weigh up whether the advantages of staying married (if there are any) are outweighed by the disadvantages. A lot depends on how your husband feels about the marriage. If he feels just the same as you it might be better all round for you to go your separate ways, but don't give up immediately. Try to rekindle that initial spark that you had at the beginning by doing together the kind of things you used to do when you were still single. If you can afford it, try to get away for a weekend away from the drudgery of being a housewife.
Tell your husband how you feel. If you have any grievances about how much help (or lack thereof) he gives you around the house make sure he knows about them. Maybe you can work through this bad patch but it's something you'll have to do together. That's all part and parcel of being married. Tell your parents how you feel, they will probably be better than anyone here at advising you what to do, because they know the situation better than any of us.
A
female
reader, wawa  +, writes (13 January 2009):
tell him it was to much to fast for you, it seems you are like me, the idea of marrige was fab, im 17 aswell and been with my guy for a year, all i want is go get married, but im 2 young, when your young you have dramatic hormone changes which will chage you physicaly ofcourse and mentaly, you seem to have out grown him, and you cant help it you young, sit him down and talk to him, explain you didnt mean for this to happen, but sweetheart, your 2 young to be settling down to be miserable for the rest of you life, wiat till your 40 for that ;-P
but seriously, take life as it comes, try gently break it to him, explain how you feel, if he loves you, he will understand.
try enjoying life a little more before you completely settle down with things such as marrige
take care x
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A
female
reader, im_a_dummy +, writes (13 January 2009):
 i think it sounds like you just need a little time away. Go on a vacation with some girlfriends for a weekend. Get away and see how you feel when you get back.
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